Donny: Phone's ringing, Dude.
The Dude: Thank you, Donny.

Tony Montana: Look at that guy. What's he got that I don't got?
Manny: Well, he's very handsome for one thing...

I don't want to survive. I want to live.

Captain

The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of 14 a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking... I highly suggest you try it.

Dr. Evil

Like a Viagra pill with a face!

P.K. Highsmith

[on killing a fish] Thank you Lord Vishnu. Thank you for coming in the form of a fish and saving our lives.

Pi Patel

The truth is I gave my heart away a long time ago, my whole heart, and I never really got it back.

Melanie Carmichael

Clerk at Flamingo Hotel: Can I call you a cab?
Police Chief: Sure, and I'll call you a cocksucker!

Dr. Buddy Rydell: Dave, there are two kinds of angry people - explosive and implosive. Explosive is the type of individual you see screaming at the cashier for not taking his coupon. Implosive is the cashier who remains quiet day after day and then finally shoots everyone in the store. You're the cashier.
Dave Buznik: No, no, no. I'm the guy in the frozen food section diallin' 911. I swear.

Isabella Swan: Graduation caps?
Edward Cullen: Private joke. We matriculate a lot.

Holla, City of Squalor!

Mr. Chow

Korben Dallas: Leeloo... how do we open these stones?
Leeloo: Wind blows... Fire Burns... Water Falls...

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