Employee: One Heffer with cheese.
Scarface: You son of a bitch, I'm right behind you! Turn around and ASK me for a Heffer with cheese, yo! Why you gotta make me feel inferior because I'm workin' the grill, B? Damn!
Employee: ...sorry.

I fucked her brains out... for eleven seconds.

Jordan Belfort

Charley Bowdre: Hey, Chavez, how come they ain't killing us?
"Dirty Steve" Stephens: Because we're in the spirit world, asshole. They can't see us.

[about Tracy] Her pussy gets so wet you can't believe it.

Dave Novotny

Evan: You could always subscribe to a site like Perfect Ten. I mean that could be anything, it could be a bowling site.
Seth: Yeah, but the problem is that they don't actually show the dick going in the pussy. Have you ever seen a pussy by itself?
Evan: No.
Seth: I dunno, it's not for me.

Bobby Boucher: So that's what opening up a can of whoop-ass feels like.
Coach Klein: Son, you just opened up a whole case of whoop-ass.

Dean Pritchard: Listen, Chang.
Megan Huang: It's Huang.
Dean Pritchard: Whatever.

I once thought I had mono for an entire year. It turned out I was just really bored.

Wayne Campbell

Kenny Fisher: Those shoes!
Denise: What?
Kenny Fisher: Do they serve an orthopedic function?

Look at how those legs go all the way up and make an ass out of themselves.

Steven Tyler

Ed Rooney: Les jeux sont faits. Translation: the game is up. Your ass is mine.

You can take the girl out of the honky tonk, but you can't take the honky tonk out of the girl.

Bobby Ray

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