Larry: What does your cunt taste like?
Alice: Heaven.

Alan Garner: There's a jungle cat in the bathroom!
Phil Wenneck: [phil walks into the bathroom, then hurries out] Holy fuck he's not kidding. There's a tiger in the bathroom!

Yeah... yum yum... yeah... nice girl... nice girl, very charming girl... I talked with her... yeah But you, you just let her walk out rigth out with the 3 stooges. And you know why? 'cause you're a big fat pussy. Well. I gotta go. Good day pussycake.

Walt Kowalski

Deputy Travis Junior: I just had the weirdest dream
Lieutenant Jim Dangle: You know you're driving, right?
[hits a porto-potty]
Lieutenant Jim Dangle: [looking back] Noone was in it.

Seth: Its like a three thing... its like ball, dick, ball.
Evan: It's like a division sign... I just wish you would take those off.

Reap it, Murphy, you son of a bitch.

William H. Bonney

What do you tell a man with two black eyes? Nothing, he's already been told twice.

Darryl

Zeus: Why do you keep calling me 'Jesus'? Do I look Puerto Rican to you?
John McClane: Guy back there called you 'Jesus'.
Zeus: He didn't say 'Jesus'. He said, "Hey, Zeus!" My name is Zeus.
John McClane: Zeus?
Zeus: Yeah, Zeus. As in father of Apollo? Mt. Olympus? Don't fuck with me or I'll shove a lightning bolt up your ass? Zeus! You got a problem with that?

Evan: Yeah chicks go nuts for that... the male camel toe.
Seth: Yea yea! The camel tail.

[to Asian gangsters] Your head is going up his ass, his head is going up his ass, and you get the short end of the straw, cause your head is going up my ass!

Hancock

Wendell: That's very linear Sherrif.
Ed Tom Bell: Well, age will flatten a man.

Loretta Bell: Be careful.
Ed Tom Bell: I always am.
Loretta Bell: Don't get hurt.
Ed Tom Bell: I never do.
Loretta Bell: Don't hurt no one.
Ed Tom Bell: [smiles] Well. If you say so.

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