It's funny. You know, when I was a little kid I always wanted a brother. I told that to mom once and she said, "You have a brother". I said, "Oh, so that's who the asshole in the other bed is".

Timothy Fenwick, Jr.

[to Mercedes] Have you seen my mother? She's very beautiful.

Ofelia

Q: I'm your new quartermaster.
James Bond: You must be joking.

Jack Swigert: Now wait a minute... all I did was stir those tanks...
Fred Haise, Sr.: What was that gauge reading before you hit the switch?
Jack Swigert: Hey, don't tell me how to fly the damned CM, all right? They brought me in here to do a job, they asked me to stir the damned tanks, and I stirred the tanks!
Fred Haise, Sr.: You didn't know what you were doing, do you?
Jim Lovell: Jack, quit kicking yourself in the ass.
Jack Swigert: This is NOT MY FAULT!
Jim Lovell: No one is saying it is. If I'm in the left-hand seat when the call comes up, I stir the tanks.
Jack Swigert: Yeah, well, tell HIM that.

[surrounded by excited reporters during the montate sequence, which shows the Ghostbusters as a sudden popular culture craze] Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, no job is too big, no fee is too big!

Dr. Peter Venkman

Your baby is the miracle the whole world has been waiting for.

Jasper

Lani Aliikai: Oh, crap!
[runs out to save drowning penguin]
Cody Maverick: Oh man, I'm in love.
Chicken Joe: You should go talk to her.
Cody Maverick: No way, man!
Chicken Joe: Dude, she's totally into you! She called you crap!

Kumar Patel: In eight hours we are going to be in Amersterdam.
Harold Lee: This is amazing.
Kumar Patel: I know dude, it's going to be exactly like Eurotrip except its not going to suck.

[frightened] I'm going bring this up with the Tenant's Association. You're not supposed to have pets in the building.

Louis

Jean Valjean: Look down, look down, don't look them in the eye.
Chain Gang: Look down, look down, you're here until you die.

Louis Dobbler: You can kill him from that far away?
Bob Lee Swagger: At a mile and a half the bullet's gonna strike with more energy than a .44 magnum, point blank. Yeah, I think you can kill him.

Frank: Good night Dwayne.
Dwayne: [scribbles on notepad] Don't kill yourself tonight.
Frank: Not on your watch Dwayne. I wouldn't do that to you.
Dwayne: [on notepad] Welcome to hell.
Frank: Thanks Dwayne. Coming from you that means a lot.

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