Norman Bates: You-... you eat like a bird.
Marion Crane: [Looking around at the stuffed birds while eating] And you'd know, of course.
Norman Bates: No, not really. Anyway, I hear the expression 'eats like a bird' .... it-it's really a fals-fals-fals-fals-fals-ity. Because birds really eat a tremendous lot. But I-I don't really know anything about birds. My hobby is stuffing things. You know .... taxidermy.

MacGruber: I just took an upper-decker in the master bathroom.
Vicki St. Elmo: Upper-decker?
MacGruber:Yeah, it's where you take a shit in the water tank and not the bowl... You look great.

[on parenting] It's like your Aunt Edna's ass. It goes on forever and it's just as frightening.

Frank

"That, changing like the snake, I might be free to cast off flesh wherein I dwell confined."

Dr. Curt Connors

I'll have a Pina Colada, not virgin. Wanna see my ID? Totally have it!

Jenna

Dumbledore: Mysterious thing, time. Powerful, and when meddled with, dangerous. Sirius Black is in the topmost cell of the dark tower. You know the laws, Miss Granger. You must not be seen, and you would do well, I feel, to return before this last chime. If not, the consequences are too ghastly to discuss. If you succeed tonight, more than one innocent life may be spared. Three turns, should do it, I think.
[He starts to exit, turns back]
Dumbledore: Oh, by the way. When in doubt, I find retracing my steps to be a wise place to begin. Good luck.
[He exits]
Ron: What the bloody hell was that all about?

See ya later Pete, no one gives a fuck about ya.

Moff

Santosh Patel: You think tiger is your friend, he is an animal, not a playmate.
Pi Patel: Animals have souls... I have seen it in their eyes.

Miss Moneypenny: James! Where have you been? I've been searching all over London for you.
Miss Moneypenny: 007 is here sir.
James Bond: Moneypenny! What gives?
Miss Moneypenny: Me, given an ounce of encouragement. You've never taken me to dinner looking like this. You've never taken me to dinner...
James Bond: I would, you know. Only "M" would have me court-martialed for... illegal use of government property.
Miss Moneypenny: Flattery will get you nowhere - but don't stop trying.

It's not what you know, it's what you can prove.

Alonzo Harris

Louis: Looking good, Billy Ray!
Billy Ray: Feeling good, Louis!

One day, lady superspy Susan Cooper, I will fuck you.

Aldo

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