Lloyd: What's the matter, Har? Some little filly break your heart?
Harry: No, it was a girl.
Alex: My dad is going to kick your ass.
Imhotep: I do not think so.
Mini-Me: [Mini-Me unzips his pants]
Nigel Powers: My lord! you're a tripod. What you been feedin' that thing, eh? It looks like a baby's arm holding an apple. Good thing is, if you ever get tired, you can use it as a kickstand!
Nobody finds their soul mate when they're ten. I mean, where's the fun in that, right?Jake
Honey? Uh... You wanna know who really killed JFK?Stanley Goodspeed
Col. Jessep: There is nothing on this earth sexier, believe me, gentlemen, than a woman you have to salute in the morning. Promote 'em all, I say, 'cause this is true: if you haven't gotten a blowjob from a superior officer, well, you're just letting the best in life pass you by.
Red: Everybody's innocent in here.
Andy Dufresne: What about you?
Red: Only guilty man in Shawshank.
Beca: You have a little something behind your ear.
Fat Amy: Leave it. It fuels my hate fire.
See ya later Pete, no one gives a fuck about ya.Moff
I've been in love with you since I was eleven, and the shit won't go away.Monica
Hey, there's even a fridge! You could put six packs of be..... [glances at his dad] ... soda in here!Tommy
Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.President Merkin Muffley