Dr. Lewis Meldman: May I ask you a question doctor, and I don’t mean to be insensitive. But, does Dr. Pinchelow has Aspergers?
Lloyd Christmas: Probably, I know he doesn’t wipe very well.

Elwood: This is definitely Lower Wacker Drive! If my estimations are correct, we should be very close to the Honorable Richard J. Daley Plaza!
Jake: That's where they got that Picasso.
Elwood: Yep.

[to Bilbo] Farewell, Master Burglar. Go back to your books, your fireplace. Plant your trees, watch them grow. If more of us valued home above gold, it would be a merrier world.

Thorin Oakenshield

Anybody interested in grabbing a couple of burgers and hittin' the cemetery?


Scarlett: Atlanta.
Mammy: Savannah would be better for ya. You just get in trouble in Atlanta.
Scarlett: What trouble are you talking about?
Mammy: You know what trouble I's talkin' 'bout. Mr. Ashley be comin' to Atlanta when he get's his leave, and you sattin' there waitin' for him, just like a spider.
Scarlett: You go pack my things like Mother said.

Elle: For that matter, any masturbatory emissions, where the sperm is clearly not seeking an egg, could be termed reckless abandonment.
Professor Callahan: You've just won your case.

Bill: Hey Ted? Wanna play 20 questions?
Ted: Okay! I got one!
Bill: Is it a mineral?
Ted: Yeah!
Bill: Are you a tank?
Ted: Whoa! Yeah!

Sidney Prescott: How do you gut someone?
Stu: You take a knife and you slit 'em from groin to sternum.
Billy: Hey. It's called tact, you fuck-rag.

I'd like to welcome you all to the Mitch Martin Freedom Festival. Now for those of you who don't know who Mitch Martin is, he's the very successful, very disease free gentleman standing by the mini bar. Now, courtesy of Speaker City, which is slashing prices on everything from beepers to DVD players, give a warm welcome Harrison welcome to my pal and your favorite, Snoop Dogg.


It's all Obi-Wan's fault. He's jealous. He's holding me back.


Ms. Darbus: This school is about more than just young men in baggy shorts flinging balls for touchdowns.
Jack Bolton: Baskets. uh They shoot baskets.

[to Beamen] You're very, very young... and your very, very stupid.

Tony D'Amato

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