I am in extreme state of arousal. Please to make sex all over my face.


It's not in my best interest to say this Frank, but quitting while you're ahead is not the same as quitting.

Chinese General

[speaking to the priest] This girl's fit for a strait-jacket. I mean she's fucked three ways to the weekend. But you know what, Father? I dig it!

Jeremy Grey

[after catching Harry scribbling on his paper]
Professor Severus Snape: Tell me, what would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?
[Harry doesn't answer]
Professor Severus Snape: You don't know? Well, let's try again... Where, Mr. Potter, would you look if I asked you to find me a bezoar?
Harry: I don't know, sir.
Professor Severus Snape: And what is the difference between monkshood and wolfsbane?
Harry: I don't know, sir.
Professor Severus Snape: Pity... clearly, fame isn't everything, is it, Mr. Potter?

Harry: What's her last name? I'll look it up.
Lloyd: You know, I don't really recall. Starts with an S! Let's see. Swim? Swammi? Slippy? Slappy? Swenson? Swanson?
Harry: Maybe it's on the briefcase.
Lloyd: Oh, yeah! It's right here.
[He reads the manufacturer's name, which is Samsonite]
Lloyd: Samsonite! I was way off! I knew it started with an S, though.

Quentin Hapsburg: Do you gamble?
Lt. Frank Drebin: Every time I order out.

John Beckwith: "I never thought my sister would meet someone who cared about what other people thought as much as she did until I met Craig?"
Claire Cleary: Yes, it's funny. It's funny because it's true.
John Beckwith: I know, but the funny because it's true bit only works if the truth is a very small thing like "everyone knows Jennifer likes to shop, ha ha ha". Honestly, I think you're better off going for something from the heart.
Claire Cleary: I think people are going to love this.
John Beckwith: I think you're going to hear crickets.
Claire Cleary: No.
John Beckwith: Sounds of silence.
Claire Cleary: Uh uh.
John Beckwith: Ok, meet me at the back of the room, I'll be the guy waiting to say I told you so.

I used to tell Walter, "Never start a fight... but always finish it." I didn't start this fight... but by god I'm going to finish it.

Christine Collins

Donkey: Man, you are a cat-tastrophe.
Puss in Boots: And you, are ri-donk-ulous.
[Both laugh]

She had these little stubby wings, like she could've glued them on, you know, like I'm gonna believe she's a fairy. So she said, "I'll prove it." So she reaches into her backpack and pulls out this invisible cloak and she ties it around my neck. And she tells me that it's impenetrable. You know what impenetrable means? It means nothing can go through it. No bullets, nothing. She told me that if I wore it, nothing would hurt me. And I did. And my whole life, I never got shot, stabbed, nothing. I mean, how weird is that?


Thank you for taking care of my bride, peasants.

Prince Edward

Darth Vader: The Emperor has been expecting you.
Luke: I know, father.
Darth Vader: So, you have accepted the truth?
Luke: I have accepted that you were once Anakin Skywalker, my father.
Darth Vader: [angrily] That name no longer has any meaning for me!

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