Paul Allen has mistaken me for this dickhead Marcus Halberstram. It seems logical because Marcus also works at P&P and in fact does the same exact thing I do and he also has a penchant for Valentino suits and Oliver Peoples glasses. Marcus and I even go to the same barber, although I have a slightly better haircut.

Patrick Bateman

Dr. Jean Grey: Girls flirt with the dangerous guy, they don't bring him home... I married a good guy.
Wolverine: I can be the good guy.
Dr. Jean Grey: Logan, the good guy sticks around.

Farva: Give me a double bacon cheeseburger.
Dimpus Burger Guy: [into mic] Double bacon cheeseburger. It's for a cop.
Farva: What the hell's that all about? You gonna spit in it now?
Dimpus Burger Guy: No, I just told him that so he makes it good.
Dimpus Burger Guy: [into mic] Don't spit in that cop's burger.
Farva: Yeah, thanks.

[greeting Han Solo] Why, you slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler. You gotta lot of guts comin' here, after what you pulled.

Lando

Dionne: Hello? There was a stop sign.
Cher: I totally paused.

Garth Algar: Hey, are you done yet? I'm getting tired of holding it.
Wayne Campbell: Yeah, that's what she said.

[to the DJ] Hit it DJ Chocolate Thunder!

Wet T-Shirt Host

Marlin: How do you know if they're ready?
Crush: Well, you never really know, but when they know, you know, y'know?

I believe no matter how random something may appear, there's still a plan.

Col. John 'Hannibal' Smith

Gas Station Guy: I didn't put nothin' up.
Anton Chigurh: Yes, you did. You've been putting it up your whole life you just didn't know it. You know what date is on this coin?
Gas Station Guy: No.
Anton Chigurh: 1958. It's been traveling 22 years to get here. And now it's here. And it's either heads or tails. And you have to say. Call it.
Gas Station Guy: Look, I need to know what I stand to win.
Anton Chigurh: Everything.
Gas Station Guy: How's that?
Anton Chigurh: You stand to win everything. Call it.

I love him! I love him for the man he wants to be. And I love him for the man he almost is.

Dorothy

Edward Cullen: I only said it would be better if we weren't friends, not that I didn't want to be.
Isabella Swan: What does that mean?
Edward Cullen: It means if you're smart... you'll stay away from me.
Isabella Swan: I think you've made your opinion of the subject on my intellect clear, too.

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