Capt. Ross: Who is this?
Kaffee: She's Joe Galloway. She's Downey's attorney. She's very pleased to meet you.

Kaffee: Whoa. Hold it. We gotta take a boat?
Barnes: Yes, sir. To get to the other side of the bay.
Kaffee: Nobody said anything about a boat.
Barnes: Is there a problem, sir?
Kaffee: No, no problem. I'm just not that crazy about boats, that's all.
Galloway: Jesus Christ, Kaffee, you're in the Navy for crying out loud.

Whoa, that's s gonna be like a billion transfers to get back to my house...

Russell

Theodore Faron: Who's the father?
Kee: There's no father. I'm a virgin. Nah! Be great, though, wouldn't it?

The Joker: Who's this loss?
Bob the Goon: This is Knox, the reporter.
The Joker: Bad tie.

Alfred: Why are you still up? Are you concerned about that strange, heroic Penguin person?
Batman: I think he knows who his parents are. There's something else.

Why didn't somebody tell me my ass was so big?

President Skroob

Clyde Barrow: Alright. Alright. If all you want's a stud service, you get on back to West Dallas and you stay there the rest of your life. You're worth more than that. A lot more than that. You know it and that's why you come along with me. You could find a lover boy on every damn corner in town. It don't make a damn to them whether you're waitin' on tables or pickin' cotton, but it does make a damn to me.
Bonnie Parker: Why?
Clyde Barrow: Why? What's you mean, "Why?" Because you're different, that's why. You know, you're like me. You want different things. You got somethin' better than bein' a waitress. You and me travelin' together, we could cut a path clean across this state and Kansas and Missouri and Oklahoma and everybody'd know about it. You listen to me, Miss Bonnie Parker. You listen to me.

Howard Hughes: Will you marry me?
Ava Gardner: You're too crazy for me.

Gimbel's Manager: HEY! There's no singin' in the North Pole!
Buddy: Yes there is!
Gimbel's Manager: No there's not!
Buddy: We sing all the time!
Gimbel's Manager: No you don't!
Buddy: Especially when we build toys!

Hey, toots! Canary bird, will you get out of the bathroom!

Stanley Kowalski

Heywood leads the league in most offensive categories, including nose hair. When this guy sneezes, he looks like a party favor.

Harry Doyle

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