Good morning, eager young minds.


Evelyn: Have you got any bright ideas?
Rick: I'm thinking, I'm thinking...
Evelyn: You better think of something fast, because, if he turns me into a mummy you're the first one I'm coming after.

David St. Hubbins: He died in a bizarre gardening accident...
Nigel Tufnel: Authorities said... best leave it... unsolved.

Hello Sam Sparks, I'm America!

Sam Sparks

Here at Globo Gym we're better than you, and we know it.

White Goodman

George Hanson: [Drinking his Jim Beam] Here's the first of the day, fellas! To old D.H. Lawrence.
[He starts flapping one arm like a chicken]
George Hanson: Neh! Neh! Neh! Fuh! Fuh! Fuh! Indians.

Here's the Remains of the Day lunchbox. Kids don't like eating at school, but if they have a Remains of the Day lunchbox they're a lot happier.

Corky St. Clair

Hey, Carmine, let me ask you something. What sets off the metal detectors first? The lead in your ass or the shit in your brains? Fat fuck.

John McClane

Bill: Hey Ted. Don't fear the reaper.
[air guitar]
Grim Reaper: I heard that!

Dante Hicks: Hey, whatcha rent? "Best of Both Worlds"?
Randal Graves: Hermaphroditic porn. Starlets with both organs. You should see the box. Beautiful chicks with dicks that put mine to shame.
Dante Hicks: And you rented this?
Randal Graves: Hey, I like to expand my horizons.

Hooper ya idiot. Starboard. Ain't you watchin' it?


Sidney Prescott: How do you gut someone?
Stu: You take a knife and you slit 'em from groin to sternum.
Billy: Hey. It's called tact, you fuck-rag.

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