Miles Logan: Put your hands on the Oodles of Noodles.
Tulley: Chicken or beef?
Miles Logan: Chicken.
T.S. Quint: [Reading the break-up letter that Renee gave Brodie] Woah, she calls you "callow" in here.
Brodie: You say that like it's bad.
T.S. Quint: It means frightened and weak-willed.
Brodie: Really? Shit. That was the only part of the letter I thought was complimentary.
See you later, irrigator.Bond
Sell my guitars? Would you tell Picasso to sell his guitars?Dewey Finn
Jay: Silent Bob stole the schematics from some foolish carpenter and found a weakness just like the fucking Death Star. You knock this crossbeam out and, fuckin' bickety-bam, the whole stage comes crashing down.
Brodie: Well we were thinking of something simple, but hey, if you want to destroy the stage, we're all for that.
Alex: So, I hear you're a real dope rapper.
Jimmy Smith Jr: Who told you I was a "dope rapper?"
Kumar: So where you going to go now, Neil?
Neil Patrick Harris: [puts on sunglasses] Wherever God takes me!
Sometimes, I like to hold a midget.Doughboy
Stella! Another one of these damn kids jumped in front of my car! Come on out here and help me take him in the house!Sam Baines
Coach Norman Dale: Five players on the floor functioning as one single unit: team, team, team - no one more important that the other.
That's a Smith & Wesson, and you've had your six.James Bond
The worst vice is advice.John Milton