Convincing a town to approve something that's already in their best interest, that's just delayed common sense!


You sunk my battleship!

Grim Reaper

You're squeezing your boobies out!

Corky St. Clair

Charles: Ehm, look. Sorry, sorry. I just, ehm, well, this is a very stupid question and... , particularly in view of our recent shopping excursion, but I just wondered, by any chance, ehm, eh, I mean obviously not because I guess I've only slept with 9 people, but-but I-I just wondered... ehh. I really feel, ehh, in short, to recap it slightly in a clearer version, eh, the words of David Cassidy in fact, eh, while he was still with the Partridge family, eh, "I think I love you," and eh, I-I just wondered by any chance you wouldn't like to... Eh... Eh... No, no, no of course not... I'm an idiot, he's not... Excellent, excellent, fantastic, eh, I was gonna say lovely to see you, sorry to disturb... Better get on...
Carrie: That was very romantic.
Charles: Well, I thought it over a lot, you know, I wanted to get it just right.

Of all the missions in all the jungles you had to walk into this one.

Topper Harley

Jack's Father: Who are you?
Spider-Man: Spider-Man.

Horse shit!


Coraline Jones: I think I heard someone calling you... Wyborn.
Wybie Lovat: What? I didn't hear anything.
Coraline Jones: Oh, I definitely heard someone... Why-were-you-born.

Andrew Beckett: What do you call a thousand lawyers chained together at the bottom of the ocean?
Joe Miller: I don't know.
Andrew Beckett: A good start.

Maria Portokalos: Toula, on my wedding night, my mother, she said to me, "Greek women, we may be lambs in the kitchen, but we are tigers in the bedroom."
Toula Portokalos: Eww. Please let that be the end of your speech.

This is the time to show them everything. Make sure they remember you.

Haymitch Abernathy

According to Hope, Froyd died of kitty Lukemia. According to me Froyd died of being trapped in a laundry basket for four days without food or water

Augusten Burroughs

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