I am surrounded by the biggest idiots in the galaxy.


Wake up lil snoozy! Smell the smelling salts!

Chip Douglas

Shorty: Yeah, Red!
Malcolm X: Come on, you missed me!
Shorty: Try this on for size!
Malcolm X: I ducked.
Shorty: [laughing] You ducked?

It's almost as if this Kabbalah crap doesn't even work!

Topher Grace

Why can't you be happy for me, and then go home and talk about me behind my back like a normal person?


[after shooting someone] people die at the fair.

Gunman at Fair in Final Scene

Milo: You trust them to keep their word?
Atticus: I trust the law.

Ulysses Everett McGill: You ever been with a woman?
Delmar O'Donnell: I gotta get the family farm back before I start worrying about that.

Major Tom Baxter: We're asking them. We're asking them for a new deadline.
General Hummel: Put the phone down.
Major Tom Baxter: The men are falling apart!
General Hummel: The men are Marines!
Major Tom Baxter: Are they?

[to Fred] You're not Alec!

Stephen Baldwin

Nicky Santoro: Back- Back up, back up a fuckin' minute here. One minute. I asked you? When the fuck did I ever ask you if I could come out here? Get this through your head, you...
Ace Rothstein: You never...
Nicky Santoro: Get this through your head you Jew motherfucker, you. You only exist out here because of me. That's the only reason. Without me, you, personally, every fuckin' wise guy skell around'll take a piece of your fuckin' Jew ass. Then where you gonna go? You're fuckin' warned. Don't ever go over my fuckin' head again. You motherfucker, you.

Colin Sullivan: Frank? What the fuck is wrong with you?
Frank Costello: [laughing] See anything you like, Colin?
Colin Sullivan: I almost fucking shot you!
Frank Costello: You're not indulging in self-abuse, are you? I hope you're not turning into one of them sob sisters who wants to get caught. You're not cracking up, are you?
Colin Sullivan: I don't crack up.
Frank Costello: Picking a place like this, where any cop can see you. Jesus.
Colin Sullivan: If it was such a fucking bad idea, why'd you show up?
Frank Costello: [turning to face Sullivan] I own the place.
Colin Sullivan: Look, I gotta tell you...
Frank Costello: You're getting re-assigned. I know.
Colin Sullivan: How the fuck do you know that?
Frank Costello: Where'd they put you?
Colin Sullivan: Hey Frank, I gotta find myself.
Frank Costello: You're telling me, sonny boy.
Colin Sullivan: I gotta find the guy you got in the department.
Frank Costello: With everybody looking up their own ass, and you looking for yourself, I'd put my money on nobody finds nothing.

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