Aldous Snow: [as he is watching TV] Didn't I fuck her once?
[Aldous sees Sarah Marshall on TV]
Aldous Snow: I did fuck her.

Griffin: Actually, I knew this jumper once... crazy bastard! Tried to hop a whole building. Won't be trying that again...
Davey: Why's that?
Griffin: That's 'cause he's dead. Killed him! Still managed to shake it a little though.

General, count me in.

Princess Leia

Not only are you a cheat, you're a gutless cheat as well.

Doyle Lonnegan

Captain von Trapp: Now, Fraulein. I want a truthful answer from you.
Maria: Yes, Captain?
Captain von Trapp: Is it possible - or could I have just imagined it - have my children by any chance been climbing trees today?
Maria: Yes, Captain.
Captain von Trapp: I see. And where, may I ask, did they get these... ummm...
Maria: Play clothes.
Captain von Trapp: Oh, is that what you call them?
Maria: I made them. From the drapes that used to hang in my bedroom.
Captain von Trapp: Drapes?
Maria: They still have plenty of wear left. The children have been everywhere in them.
Captain von Trapp: Do you mean to tell me that my children have been roaming about Salzburg dressed up in nothing but some old drapes?
Maria: Mmm-hmmm. And having a marvelous time!

Julien: [King Julian has popped out from a cake] Hey, surprise, freaks! I am coming with you!
Alex: Oh ho ho, no, thank you.
Julien: Oh, *yes*, thank you. It is *my* plane!

Sissy: Your shit is really getting tired, Justice.
Justice: Call me 'Boo-Boo-Kitty-Fuck', bitch.

Lawrence Jamieson: Do you ever have a single thought that originates from above the waist?
Freddy Benson: No!

Listen guys, there are plenty of successful people who didn't go to college. Albert Einstein. You know? Pocahontas never went to college. Corey Feldman and Corey Haim; they had a great run. Both Lewis and Clark. Suzanne Somers. Bono.

Bartleby Gaines

Logan: We didn't sign up for this.
Victor Creed: Who do you think you are? This is what we do!

I call on those who live in the shadows. Fight with me now!

Maleficent

[Anouk has come home from school upset]
Vianne Rocher: Anouk, just tell me what happened?
Anouk Rocher: Are you Satan's helper?
Vianne Rocher: Well, it... it's not easy, being different.
Anouk Rocher: Why can't we go to church?
Vianne Rocher: Well, you can if you want... but it won't make things easier.
Anouk Rocher: Why can't you wear black shoes like the other mothers?

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