Nice Greek girls who don't find a husband, work in the family restaurant. So here I am, day after day, year after year, 30 and way past my expiration date.

Toula Portokalos

Wade: What's the matter with you? Ain't you gonna talk to me? Did it go all right?
Sueleen Gay: Oh, Wade.
Wade: What?
Sueleen Gay: I had to do me a striptease tonight in front of all those men... in order to get to sing at the Parthenon with Barbara Jean.
Wade: Oh, shit, Sueleen, I... That's dreadful! That's terrible, girl! I mean... I don't know how to tell you this, but I been meanin' to... you can't sing. You may as well face the fact you cannot sing. You ain't never gon' be no star. I wish you'd give it up. They gon' kill ya. They gon' tear your heart out if you keep on. They gon' walk on your soul, girl.
Sueleen Gay: What are you talkin' about?
Wade: You can't sing. Do you understand that?
Sueleen Gay: Yeah? You wanna make a bet? You wanna come to the Parthenon and watch me sing with Barbara Jean?
Wade: I am leavin' for Detroit Wednesday.
Sueleen Gay: You just come and watch, Wade.
Wade: I'm leavin' for Detroit, and if you wanna go you just come on. They gonna kill you in this town.
Sueleen Gay: Well, you come and see.
Wade: They gon' use you. You know that.
Sueleen Gay: Bye, Wade.
[Leaves]
Wade: Dumb bitch. I don't know why I stick around. She just makes me so goddamn mad I could spit.

John Coffey: You know, I fell asleep this afternoon and had me a dream. I dreamed about Del's mouse.
Paul Edgecomb: Did you, John?
John Coffey: I dreamed he got down to that place Boss Howell talked about, that Mouseville place. I dreamed there was kids, and how they laughed at his tricks! My! I dreamed those two little blonde-headed girls were there. They 'us laughing, too. I put my arms around 'em and sat 'em on my knees, and there 'us no blood comin' outta their hair and they 'us fine. We all watch Mr. Jingles roll that spool, and how we did laugh. Fit to bust, we was.

Hutch: What else can you tell me about the guys that hired you?
Chau: Not much. Couple of whiteys. Nice suits. They pay. I do job.
Hutch: What'd they look like?
Chau: I don't know. They're white. All you guys look alike to me.
Hutch: That's funny. All you guys look alike to us.

Clark Griswald: So, this is the old homestead, eh?
Cousin Eddie: Yeah. I don't know for how much longer, though. The bank's been after me like flies on a rib roast.

Cher's saving herself for Luke Perry.

Dionne

Do you want to be like me? Or do you want to BE me?

Jesse James

Bond: Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
Q: That's putting it mildly, 007!

Matthew: [high] Heyyy, it's my competition! Ryan, what's up my man?
Ryan: Jesus, what happened to you?
Matthew: Just living life, my man.

I've had some girlfriends too, but all they wanted from me was weed and shit.

Jay

Beau's Mother: So you're opening for the looney tunes? They need to lock that one up and throw away the key.
Beau Hutton: She's not crazy.

[about to pass out from drugs] I don't see why white man has to sit in a nigger electric chair. White man should have his own damn electric chair.

William 'Wild Bill' Wharton

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