Oh: I'm a virgin by choice.
Zed: Ha. Not your choice!

[narrating] Why was Harold talking to this man? This man... was an idiot; this man used words like "wibbly-wobbly" and "convo", and explained that trees were trees. Of course trees were trees; Harold knew that trees were trees.

Karen Eiffel

The day we stop lookin', Charlie, is the day we die.

Lt. Col. Frank Slade

Keaton always said, "I don't believe in God, but I'm afraid of him." Well I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Keyser Soze.

Verbal

Nagini tells me that the old Muggle caretaker is standing right outside the door. Step aside, Wormtail, so that I can give our guest a proper greeting. Avada Kedavra!

Voldemort

Chubbs: Back in 1965, Sports Illustrated said I was going to be the next Arnold Palmer.
Happy Gilmore: Yeah? What happened?
Chubbs: They wouldn't let me play on the Pro Tour anymore.
Happy Gilmore: Ah, I'm sorry. Because you're black?
Chubbs: Hell no! Damned alligator BIT my hand off!
[Shows Happy his wooden hand]
Happy Gilmore: OH MY GOD!
Chubbs: Yeah. tournament down in Florida. I hooked my ball in the rough down by the lake. Damned alligator just POPPED up, cut me down on my prime. He got me, but I tore one of the bastard's eyes out though. Look at that.
[Shows Happy a small glass jar with an eyeball in it]
Happy Gilmore: You're pretty sick, Chubbs.

Chip Heron: Hey, how was school?
Cady: Fine.
Betsy Heron: Were people nice?
Cady: No.
Chip Heron: Did you make any friends?
Cady: Yes.

Steve Rogers: Doc... I think now is the perfect time for you to get angry.
Bruce Banner: That's my secret Cap, I'm always angry.

You're a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make 14 dollars the hard way?

Al Czervik

Tyler Durden: Do you know what a duvet is?
Narrator: It's a comforter...
Tyler Durden: It's a blanket. Just a blanket.

[bursts into a room of runaway slave catchers, guns drawn] D'Artagnan, motherfuckers!

Django

I know you don't smoke weed, I know this; but I'm gonna get you high today, 'cause it's Friday; you ain't got no job... and you ain't got shit to do.

Smokey

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