When do we start?

Sam Wilson

Bring her to me... NOW!


Son, you got a panty on your head.


Why can't you just die?


Sometimes, I like to hold a midget.


Wipe that smile off your face, you're a dead giveaway.

Julie Beckley

You blew it. Whoo, you blew it, man. You did not want to cut his hair off, trust me.

Roy O'Bannon

Mr. Jones! I've heard a lot about you, sir. Your appearance is exactly the way I imagined.


The most liberating constitutional amendment in history, passed by corruption, aided and abetted by the purest man in America.

Thaddeus Stevens

Hey, dude, you really shouldn't drink and horse.


It's called "life," John. Activities available; just add meaning.


Larry: You're seeing him now? Since when?
Anna: Since my opening last year.
Anna: I'm disgusting.
Larry: You're phenomenal. You're so clever.

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