You're afraid of our fleet. Well, you should be. Personally, I'd give us one chance in three. More tea anyone?

Captain Ramius

We'll see who's powerless now!

Captain

Fletcher: You lied about your age to make yourself older, but why would any woman WANNA DO THAT?
Samantha: I changed it so I could get married.
Fletcher: AND THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE!

What are you gonna do with one shoelace? Floss your ass with it.

Miles Logan

[in British accent] "Beat this wall, Amin." "Dig the latreen, Amin." And now, here I am. The President of Uganda. And who put me here, huh? It was the British.

Idi Amin

What is your damage, Heather?

Veronica Sawyer

Hud: Look, all I'm saying is that this thing coulda have come from anywhere! It could have come from outer space!
Marlena Diamond: Like Superman?
Hud: Yeah! Wait... you know who Superman is?
Marlena Diamond: [sarcastically] Wait, you know Superman? I think I'm feeling something here... Are you aware of Garfield?

Dude, woman up!

Go Go

[on seeing eggs scratching his crotch] NO! Don't scratch those! That's why they're called privates!

Winnie

[after Al fix his car] Look at that! You're a goddamn wizard, Al!

The Kid

The kraken has been unleashed! Feel the Fat Amy force!

Fat Amy

Cassandra: You know, I haven't seen Garth in a while. What's he up to?
Wayne: Oh, Garth's doing his laundry.
Cassandra: Too bad he doesn't have a girlfriend to do HIS laundry.
Wayne: Oh yeah; thanks for doing my laundry. Hey Cassandra, how do you get my clothes so white and fresh-smelling?
Cassandra: It's an age-old Cantonese family method that very few people know about.
Wayne: Ahh... Wait a minute... Calgon? Ancient Chinese secret, huh?

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