Matt Farrell: You okay?
John McClane: I'll let you know in a minute.

You took your boots off? You put your feet on the table? You shit-kicking, stinky, horse manure smellin' motherfucker you. You fuck me up over there, I'll stick you in a hole in the fuckin' desert.

Nicky Santoro

Lacey Underall: You're crazy!
Ty Webb: That's what they said about Son of Sam.

Stan: Chef, how do you make a woman like you more than any other guy?
Chef: Oh, that's easy. You just gotta find the clitoris.
Stan: Huh?
Chef: Whoops.

George Llewelyn Davies: Excuse me, is he bothering you, sir? My brother can be an extremely irritating sort of person.
J.M. Barrie: Ah, Prince George, I take it. And what precisely is um...
[to Michael]
J.M. Barrie: What did you say your name was?
Michael Llewelyn Davies: Michael.
J.M. Barrie: What precisely is Michael's crime?
George Llewelyn Davies: He's my younger brother.
J.M. Barrie: Ah, fair enough. Sorry lad, I cannot free you.
Michael Llewelyn Davies: That's all right.

Hmm... Murdered by pirates, a heart torn out and eaten, meet Victoria... Can't quite decide which sounds more fun...

Yvaine

I know you can talk, so say you love me!

Brendan Harris

[about Logan] The kid was obviously gay.

Iris Reisen

Okay I think it's going to go something like this, just stay with me. Hi, this is Gale Weathers with an exclusive eyewitness account of this amazing breaking story. Several more local teens are dead, bringing to an end the harrowing mystery of the masked killings that has terrified this peaceful community like the plot of some scary movie. It all began with the scream of a 911, and ended in a bloodbath that has rocked the town of Woodsboro. All played out here in this peaceful farmhouse, far from the crimes and the sirens of the larger cities that its residents have fled. Okay, let's take it back to one. Come on, move it! This is my big shot. Let's go.

Gale

Chon Wang: See! I told you so!
Roy O'Bannon: No, you said "wet shirt don't break," not "piss shirt bend bar"!

Rita: Evan, what happened? Did you fall in a mine shaft? Did you just come out of a coma?
Evan Baxter: No.
Rita: Were you attacked by a werewolf?
Evan Baxter: No, I wasn't.

Chili Palmer: How many miles to the gallon to you get on those Hummers, about 12?
Dabu: Nine.
Sin LaSalle: Dabu! Thank you, Mr. Goodwrench.

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