You gentlemen aren't REALLY trying to kill my son, are you?

Clara Thornhill

You want to know something? I don't think Mozart's going to help at all.


David Skylark: There’s something out there!
Aaron Rapoport: It’s a tiger.
David Skylark: I didn’t want it to come to this but you’re going to have to fight that tiger!
Agent Lacey: Please tell me you know that that’s a stupid idea.
David Skylark: Do not be a gentleman. You go right for the f***ing balls!
Aaron Rapoport: I don’t see it’s balls.

Donna McLoughlin: You can't leave yet, the kitchen isn't even finished yet.
John McLoughlin: Will you forget about the kitchen for a minute. I'm kinda stuck here.
Donna McLoughlin: Well get unstuck John.

Trip: See the way I figure, I figure this war would be over a whole lot sooner if you boys just turned right on around and headed back on down that way, and you let us head on up there where the real fighting is.
Heckled Union Soldier: We got men dyin' up that road.
Trip: And there wouldn't be nothing but rebs dyin if they'd let the fifty-fourth in it.

We got no food, no jobs... our PET'S HEADS ARE FALLING OFF!"


You know who you are and I know what you're not.

Tobin Frost

What's wrong with y'all? Y'all are playin' like some little girls! Y'all act like you never played football before! These guys are nothin'! They bleed just like we do, and sweat just like we do. They went through two-a-days. We went through two-a-days in 110 degree heat. I want you to hit everything that move! If the ref gets in your way, you hit him! They're cheatin' us too! They're against us too. This is our team. This is us! Let's go right now! Let's get it off now and let's go!

Ivory Christian

Archie: You make me feel free.
Wanda: Free?
Archie: Wanda, do you have any idea what it's like being English? Being so correct all the time, being so stifled by this dread of, of doing the wrong thing, of saying to someone "Are you married?" and hearing "My wife left me this morning," or saying, uh, "Do you have children?" and being told they all burned to death on Wednesday. You see, Wanda, we'll all terrified of embarrassment. That's why we're so... dead. Most of my friends are dead, you know, we have these piles of corpses to dinner. But you're alive, God bless you, and I want to be, I'm so fed up with all this. I want to make love with you, Wanda. I'm a good lover - at least, used to be, back in the early 14th century. Can we go to bed?
Wanda: Yeah.

Cheese, if you ever disrespect her again like that, I'm gonna pull your fuckin' card, okay? So you're saying you didn't do it, fine. We'll take your money, and we'll be on our way. When it turns out you're lying, I'm gonna spend every nickel of that money to fuck you up. I'm gonna bribe cops to go after you, I'm gonna pay guys to go after your weak fuckin' crew, and I'm gonna tell all the guys I know that you're a C.I. and a rat, and I know a lot of people. And after that, you're gonna wish you listened to me, 'cause your shitty pool hall crime syndicate headquarters is gonna get raided, and your doped-up bitches are gonna get sent back to Laos, and this fuckin' retard right here is gonna be testifying against you for a reduced sentence, while you're gettin' cornholed in your cell by a gang of crackers. 'Cause from what I've heard, the guys that get sent up Concord for killing kids, life's a motherfucker.

Patrick Kenzie

I'm gettin' ready to launch a little thing called operation sweep her off her feet.


Becky: Shit, I had to wait on a guy I blew after Junior Prom.
Randal Graves: Yeah, I've waited on your brother too.

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