How many "f's" in "catastrophic"?

Lois Lane

[Mike gets Nikki's machine at 2:30 in the morning]
Mike: Hi, uh, Nikki, this is Mike. I met you at the, um, at the Dresden tonight. I just called to say that I had a great time...and you should call me tomorrow, or in two days, whatever. Anyway, my number is 213-555-4679 -
[beeps]
Mike: [calls back] Hi, Nikki, this is Mike again. I just called 'cause it sounded like your machine might've cut me off when I, before I finished leaving my number. Anyway, uh, and, y'know, and also, sorry to call so late, but you were still at the Dresden when I left so I knew I'd get your machine. Anyhow, uh, my number's 21--
[beeps]
Mike: [calls back] 213-555-4679. That's it. I just wanna leave my number. I didn't want you to think I was weird or desperate, or... we should just hang out and see where it goes cuz it's nice and, y'know, no expectations. Ok? Thanks a lot. Bye bye.
[hangs up]
Mike: [walks away, then walks back and calls again] I just got out of a 6-year relationship, Ok? That should help explain why I'm acting so weird. I just wanted you to know that. It's not you, it's me. I'm sorry... This is Mike.
[hangs up]
Mike: [calls back] Hi, Nikki, this is Mike. Could you just call me when you get in? I'm gonna be up for awhile and I'd just rather speak to you in person instead of trying to fit it all into-
[the machine beeps]
Mike: Fuck! [calls back] Uh, Nikki? Mike. It's uh, uh, it's just, uh, this just isn't working out. I think you're great, but maybe we should just take some time off from each other. It's not you, it's me. It's what I'm going through, alright? It's uh... it's only been 6 months-
Nikki: [picks up] Mike?
Mike: Nikki? Great! Did you just walk in or were you listening all along?
Nikki: Don't ever call me again.
Mike: Wow. I guess you're home.

Scaramanga: A duel between titans. My golden gun against your Walther PPK -- each of use with a fifty-fifty chance.
Bond: Six bullets to your own?
Scaramanga: I only need one.
Bond: Sounds a bit old fashioned, doesn't it? I mean, pistols at dawn, that sort of thing.
Scaramanga: Indeed it is, Mr. Bond. But it still remains the only true test for gentlemen.
Bond: I doubt if you qualify on that score.

Hamm: Wow. Impressive wingspan. Very good.
Woody: Oh, what? What? These are plastic. He can't fly.
Buzz: They are a terillium-carbonic alloy, and I can fly.
Woody: No, you can't.
Buzz: Yes, I can.
Woody: Can't.
Buzz: Can.
Woody: Can't, can't, ca-an't.
Buzz: I tell you, I could fly around this room with my eyes closed.
Woody: Okay, Mr. Lightbeer, prove it.
Buzz: All right then, I will.

I'll take responsibility here. I'll be the only person in this administration who's willing to take responsibility for anything.

Henry Kissinger

Wallace: Reach for the sky, O'Bannon, ha ha!
Roy O'Bannon: That's my line. He stole my gang, he's stealing my lines. It's unbelievable!

Angela Holden: [bored in bed] Wanna fuck?
Johnny Truelove: Okay.
[they strip down, begin making out]

Men do not fear swords, they fear monsters.

Vlad Tepes

Ray Charles: Ms. Antoine, it's been two weeks.
Della Bea Robinson: It's been three.

[to Mills] Detective. Detective. DETECTIVE! You're looking for me.

John Doe

Jessica: I am telling them you're twelve so you can fly unaccompanied and the stewardess won't carry you around and stuff like that.
Jonah Baldwin: Are you crazy! Who'd believe I'm twelve?
Jessica: If it's in the computer, they believe anything.
Jonah Baldwin: Are you sure?
Jessica: Do you want me to say that you are really really short for your age and they shouldn't say anything because it would hurt your feelings.
Jonah Baldwin: Yea, that's a great idea!

Cassia: I couldn't believe he had the strength to do that.
Ariadne: Then you didn't see his muscles?
Cassia: That's not what I meant.

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