[after a shipwreck]
Beni: Hey, O'Connell! It looks to me like I've got all the horses!
Rick: Hey, Beni! Looks to me like you're on the wrong side of the river!

Kurt Kelly: Hey Ram, doesn't this cafeteria have a no fags allowed rule?
J.D.: Well, they seem to have an open door policy for assholes though don't they?

Hey, you'd better check your conscience at the door sweetie. I'm not here to be loved.


Mike: Hi.
Lorraine: Hi.
Mike: I'm Mike.
Lorraine: Hi Mike, I'm Lorraine.
Mike: Like the quiche.
Lorraine: Like the quiche? That's a really original joke.
Mike: I like quiche.
Lorraine: I thought real men didn't like quiche?
Mike: Well, it seems my reputation had preceded me here.
Lorraine: You not a real man?
Mike: Not lately.

[upon reaching Claw Island]
Robin: Holey rusted metal, Batman!
Batman: Huh?
Robin: The ground, it's all metal. It's full of holes. You know, holey.
Batman: Oh.

Holly McClane: Honey, this is the '90s. Y'know, microchips, microwaves, air phones.
John McClane: As far as I'm concerned, progress peaked with frozen pizza.

Wyatt Earp: How are you?
Doc Holliday: I'm dying, how are you?

The Bride: How did you find me?
Bill: [off screen] I'm the man.

How do you explain school to a higher intelligence?


Chili Palmer: How many miles to the gallon to you get on those Hummers, about 12?
Dabu: Nine.
Sin LaSalle: Dabu! Thank you, Mr. Goodwrench.

[to Bella] How much could you mean to him if he left you here, unprotected? But, I can't help myself. You're so... mouthwatering.


Jake: How often does the train go by?
Elwood: So often that you won't even notice it.

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