True story, last weekend there was a religious revival at Madison Square Garden. Bishop Fulton Sheen made such a stirring speech that 10,000 people converted to Catholicism. Then Billy Graham got up and did some inspired preaching and 10,000 people converted to Protestantism, then to close the program, Pat Boone got up and sang "There's A Gold Mine In The Sky" and 20,000 Jews joined the Air Force!

Charlie Dillon

Navy Seal Commander: This thing is way bigger than we thought it was. They're going to hit us at home.
Navy Seal: That ain't gonna happen.

Audrey: Where were you?
Fletcher: Having sex.
Audrey: Well, I hope it was with someone *very* special!

Mitch: Beanie, you remember Cheese, Rodney's kid brother?
Dean Pritchard: Actually, my name's not Cheese anymore. It's Gordon Pritchard.
Beanie: Oh yeah. Cheeeeeese. Yeah, didn't we lock you in a dumpster one time?
Dean Pritchard: Yea, I got out.
Beanie: Cool man. Good. Glad you did.

My attorney had never been able to accept the notation, often espoused by former drug abusers, that you can get a lot higher without drugs than with them, and neither have I for that matter.

Raoul Duke

It's beer o'clock, and I'm buying.

Teddy

Deb: Are they still letting you run for president?
Pedro: Yes. I don't understand... they say you're not allowed to have pinatas that look like real people, but in Mexico, we do it all the time.

I think you do. There's another kind. Not high-minded, not pure, but alive. Now, that your tastes at this time should incline towards the juvenile is understandable; but for you to marry that boy would be a disaster. Because there's two kinds of women. There are two kinds of women and you, as we well know, are not the first kind. You, my dear, are a slut.

Komarovski

The Architect: Hello, Neo.
Neo: Who are you?
The Architect: I am the Architect. I created the Matrix. I've been waiting for you. You have many questions, and although the process has altered your consciousness, you remain irrevocably human. Ergo, some of my answers you will understand, and some of them you will not. Concordantly, while your first question may be the most pertinent, you may or may not realize it is also the most irrelevant.

Landon: Jamie... I love you.
[long pause]
Landon: Now would be the time to say something.
Jamie: I told you not to fall in love with me.

M: I thought I could trust you. You said you weren't motivated by revenge.
James Bond: I am motivated by my duty.
M: I think you're so blinded by inconsolable rage that you don't care who you hurt. When you can't tell your friends from your enemies, it's time to go.
James Bond: You don't have to worry about me.

Mind-bottling. Like your mind is trapped in a bottle.

Chazz

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