Businessman: It says one hundred percent guaranteed, you moron!
Brad Hamilton: Mister, if you don't shut up I'm gonna kick one hundred percent of your ass!

Mark: When my grandfather died, there was one candle next to his bed. And the candle started flickering. We all thought it was him going to Heaven, you know?
Leo: You don't pass through fire to get to Heaven. I think he went to Hell.

Do know what's gonna be here? Right here? A lake. As far as the eyes can see. Hundreds of feet deep. HUNDREDS of feet deep. Did you ever look out over a lake and think of somethin' buried underneath it? Buried underneath it. Well man, that's just about as buried as you can get.

Lewis

Eugene: OK. You know, I'm going to have to consult my spirit guides here, because you tell me that Trevor is withholding from you, but you won't tell me anything specific and you still want me to sit here and divine why.
Arley: Divine why? You always talk like that?
Eugene: Yes.
Arley: You go to some big, fancy school?
Eugene: Yes.
Arley: Think you can stop rubbing my nose in it?

I have to believe in a world outside my own mind. I have to believe that my actions still have meaning, even if I can't remember them. I have to believe that when my eyes are closed, the world's still there. Do I believe the world's still there? Is it still out there?... Yeah. We all need mirrors to remind ourselves who we are. I'm no different.

Leonard Shelby

I look like someone's homophobic aunt!

Susan Cooper

Whoa. Where did you say you were from again?

Michael

Cardinal Roark: Will that bring you satisfaction, my son? Killing a helpless, old, fart?
Marv: Killing? No. No satisfaction. Everything up until the killing, will be a gas.

Ethan Tremblay: My father always had a saying "When a day starts like this it's all uphill from here.
Peter Highman: Uphill? No, it's all downhill from here.
Ethan Tremblay: But nobody wants to be down, everybody wants to be up. It's all uphill from here.
Peter Highman: But it's easier to go downhill. So your dad had no idea what the fuck he was talking about.

Puss-in-Boots: Stop, ogre! I have misjudged you.
Shrek: Join the club. We got jackets.

This was to be my final hit, but let's be clear about this. There's final hits and final hits. What kind was this to be?

Mark "Rent-boy" Renton

Annabeth Markum: Celeste called looking for you. She was worried something might happen. She told me about Dave. Told me what she told you. What kind of wive says those things about her husband? And why'd she run to you?
Jimmy Markum: Why did not you call?
Annabeth Markum: Because it's like I told the girls. Their daddy is a king. And a king knows what to do and does it.

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