Oh, my friends. I'm so pleased you're not dead!

Sallah

Judge Smails: Oh Porterhouse, look at the wax build up on these shoes I want that wax stripped off there, then I want them creamed and buffed with a fine chamois, and I want them now. Chop chop.
Smoke Porterhouse: Yes judge, right away judge.

C-3PO: Oh. They've encased him in Carbonite. He should be quite well protected. If he survived the freezing process, that is.
Darth Vader: Well, Calrissian, did he survive?
Lando: Yes, he's alive, and in perfect hibernation.
Darth Vader: He's all yours, bounty hunter.

Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration, don't fail us now.

Elwood

Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Whose gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinburg? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago, and you curse the marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

Col. Jessep

Wendell: That's very linear Sherrif.
Ed Tom Bell: Well, age will flatten a man.

The entire British empire was built on cups of tea, and if you think I'm going to war without one, mate, you're mistaken.

Eddie

[the videotape of Shannon back-dooring Trica is playing on the big screen, with cheesy 70s porno music in background]
Shannon Hamilton: Yeah, who's your favourite New Kid. Yeah, call me Joey. Oh, come on. Don't make me get loose. Yeah, that's right. Call me Donnie. Oh, girl. Oh, please don't go girl.
Jay: Goddamn. This is one wacky game show.
Brodie: [to the cops] Hey! That girl's only 15!
[cops focus their attention on Shannon]
Shannon Hamilton: Ah, 15. I thought she was 36!
[cops are approaching him]
Shannon Hamilton: Come on, guys. Tell me you wouldn't have popped her.

Officer Smy: [to Ursula] If you were my wife, I'd take you down a peg or two.
[to Foster]
Officer Smy: Hey douche bag.
Foster: [to Ursula] If you were my wife, I'd massage your feet 'til you fell asleep.
Ursula: Nice try.

Today is history. Today will be remembered. Years from now the young will ask with wonder about this day. Today is history and you are part of it. Six hundred years ago when elsewhere they were footing the blame for the Black Death, Casimir the Great - so called - told the Jews they could come to Krakow. They came. They trundled their belongings into the city. They settled. They took hold. They prospered in business, science, education, the arts. With nothing they came and with nothing they flourished. For six centuries there has been a Jewish Krakow. By this evening those six centuries will be a rumor. They never happened. Today is history.

Amon Goeth

[turning into Dark Phoenix] GET OUT OF MY HEAD!

Dr. Jean Grey

Lloyd: Uh, what is the Soup Du Jour?
Flo, Waitress #1: It's the Soup of the Day.
Lloyd: Mmmm. That sounds good. I'll have that.

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