Maria: Dear Father, now I know why You sent me here. To help these children prepare for a new mother. And I pray this will become a happy family in Thy sight. God bless the captain. God bless Liesl and Friedrich. God bless Louisa, Brigitta, Marta and little Gretl. And I forgot the other boy. What's his name? Well, God bless what's-his-name. God bless the Reverend Mother and Sister Margaretta and everybody at the abbey. And now, dear God, about Liesl. Help her know that I'm her friend and help her tell me what she's been up to.
Liesl: Are you going to tell on me?
Maria: Help me to be understanding so I may guide her footsteps. In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost.
Liesl: I was out walking and somebody locked the doors early. I didn't want to wake everybody, so when I saw your window open. You're not going to tell Father, are you?
Maria: How in the world did you climb up here?
Liesl: It's how we always got in to play tricks on the governess. Louisa can make it with a whole jar of spiders in her hand.
Maria: Spiders? Liesl, were you out walking all by yourself? If we wash that dress tonight, nobody would notice it tomorrow. You could put this on. Take your dress and put it to soak in the bathtub. Come back here and sit on the bed, and we'll have a talk.
Liesl: I told you today I didn't need a governess. Well, maybe I do.

Robert Wakefield: I can't believe you brought my daughter to this place.
Seth Abrahams: Woah. Why don't you just back the fuck up, man. "To this place"? What is that shit? Okay, right now, all over this great nation of ours, 100,000 white people from the suburbs are cruisin' around downtown asking every black person they see "You got any drugs? You know where I can score some drugs?" THINK about the effect that that has on the psyche of a black person, on their possibilities. I... God I guarantee you bring a hundred thousand black people into your neighborhood, into fuckin' Indian Hills, and they're asking every white person they see "You got any drugs? You know where I can score some drugs?" Within a DAY everyone would be selling. Your friends. Their kids. Here's why: it's an unbeatable market force man. It's a 300 percent markup value. You can go out on the street and make $500 in two hours, come back and do whatever you want to do with the rest of your day and, I'm sorry, you're telling me that... you're telling me that white people would still be going to law school?

Buzz Lightyear: Don't worry, Woody. In just a few hours you'll be sitting around a campfire with Andy making delicious hot Schmoes.
Woody: They're called "S'mores", Buzz.
Buzz Lightyear: Yes, yes. Of course.

[both have discovered that they were on the desert and one tried to kill the other]
John Smith: I missed you.
Jane Smith: I missed you too.

I guess I could use a little exercise.


The world's ran out of tricks. Everyone plays.


Boys, oh boys... I think he's come back for his noon feeding.


I'd hate to go on a date with Judge Edie Franklin and have her judge me, that'd be no fun.

Buck Laughlin

Van Wilder: Whoa, trick or treat. What's going on?
Richard: This vaginal discharge won't let us partake in the party.
Van Wilder: Graphic.

Dr. Grace Trevelyan Grey: But he never sleeps in. Certainly not at this hour. Unless of course he's ill. Is he?
Dr. Grace Trevelyan Grey: Ah!
Jason Taylor: Sorry, Mr. Grey.
Christian Grey: It's fine. I know how she can be.
Dr. Grace Trevelyan Grey: She? If you're trying to avoid me the very least you can do is call me by my correct name which is mom.
Anastasia Steele: Hi!
Dr. Grace Trevelyan Grey: [surprised] Oh, dear God!
Christian Grey: Mother, Anastasia Steele. Ana, meet my mother Dr. Grace Trevelyan-Grey.
Dr. Grace Trevelyan Grey: You have no idea how delighted I am to meet you.
Anastasia Steele: It's nice to meet you too, Dr. Grey.
Dr. Grace Trevelyan Grey: Grace. She's very pretty!

Keep the receipts, cos this ain't the Mafia

Lenny Cole

Alpa Chino: Maybe I just knew I had to represent...
Kirk Lazarus: Hot damn!
Alpa Chino: ...because they had one good part in there for a *black* man, and they gave it to "Crocodile Dundee"!
Kirk Lazarus: [offended] Pump your brakes kid, that man's a national treasure.
Alpa Chino: I'm sorry a dingo ate your baby!
Kirk Lazarus: You about to cross some fuckin' line!

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