Chewie! I can't see, pal. What's going on? Luke? Luke's crazy! He can't even take care of himself, much less rescue anybody. A Jedi Knight? I'm out of it for a little while, and everyone gets delusions of grandieur!

Han Solo

Nick: "You're gonna be our lookout."
Dale: "I'm gonna honk the horn six times."
Kurt: "Something much more subtle..."
Dale: "Four honks?"
Nick: "Can you honk once?"
Dale: "People honk once all the time - you're gonna be running in and out of the house..."

Luther: How much did you lose?
Johnny Hooker: [winces] All of it.
Luther: In one damn night? What are you spraying money around like that for, you could've been nailed.
Johnny Hooker: I checked the place first. There were no dicks in there.
Luther: But you're a con man! And you blew it like a pimp!

Arthur: You used to say, [lowers voice] "Arthur, you can do anything under the sun".
Hobson: I never spoke like that.
Arthur: It was a bit like that.

You need to keep BOTH eyes open.

Nick Fury

Only *I* can live, forever.

Lord Voldemort

Joe: [trying to get Jerry to face reality regarding his engagement to Osgood] Jerry, Jerry, will you take my advice? Forget about the whole thing, will ya? Just keep telling yourself: you're a boy, you're a boy.
Jerry: I'm a boy.
Joe: That's the boy.
Jerry: [coming around] I'm a boy. I'm a boy. I wish I were dead. I'm a boy. Boy, oh boy, am I a boy. Now, what am I gonna do about my engagement present?
Joe: What engagement present?
Jerry: Osgood gave me a bracelet.
Joe: [takes it and inspects the stones with Beinstock's glasses] Hey, these are real diamonds!
Jerry: Of course they're real! What do you think? My fiance is a bum?

Melissa: I just wish your friends were as mature as you.
Stu Price: They are mature, actually. You just have to get to know them better.
Phil Wenneck: [yelling from outside] Paging Dr. Faggot. Dr. Faggot!
Stu Price: I should go.
Melissa: That's a good idea, Dr. Faggot.

I'll get to it... when I get to it.

Officer Gutierrez

Run for it? Running's not a plan! Running's what you do once a plan fails!

Earl Bassett

He was wracked with confusion. For the first time in his life, he understood the true meaning of the expressions "horns of a dilemma" and "between a rock and a hard place" - although the concept of "paying through the nose" had always tormented him. How does the money get in the nose in the first place? Once in, is it pulled out by hand, or is a sneeze involved? And who would accept such a transaction? Burning questions all, but he had bigger fish to fry.

Adam Shipley

[Killer whales are menacing the adelies and Mumble perched on a buoy]
Ramón: They're making us appetizers!
Néstor: They're appe-teasing us! Ha, ha, ha! Oh, we're gonna die.

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