Ty Webb: Let me tell you a little story? I once knew a guy who could have been a great golfer, could have gone pro, all he needed was a little time and practice. Decided to go to college instead. Went for four years, did pretty well. At the end of his four years, his last semester he was kicked out... You know what for? He was night putting, just putting at night with the fifteen-year-old daughter of the Dean... You know who that guy was Danny?
Danny Noonan: No.
Ty Webb: Take one good guess.
Danny Noonan: Bob Hope?
Ty Webb: Ha ha... No, that guy was Mitch Comstein, my roommate. He was a good guy.

Professor Snape: [taps the blank Marauder's Map with his wand] Reveal your secrets.
[writing appears on the map]
Professor Snape: Read it.
Harry: "Messrs. Mooney, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs, offer their compliments to Professor Snape and..."
Professor Snape: Go on.
Harry: "... and request that he keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business."

Claire, I'm more afraid of bein' nothing than I am of being hurt.

Cole Trickle

Honey Bunny: [about to rob a diner] I love you, Pumpkin.
Pumpkin: I love you, Honey Bunny.
Pumpkin: [Standing up with a gun] All right, everybody be cool, this is a robbery!
Honey Bunny: Any of you fucking pricks move, and I'll execute every motherfucking last one of ya!

Well, no offense, but if that is a woman it looks like she was beaten with an ugly stick!

Austin Powers

Maybe you've lost your faith in people. But you must still be faithful to something. You must still care about something. Maybe we can't change what is. But trying to save a life isn't wasting your life, is it?

Sarah Miller

Frankie Dunn: How many eyes do you need to finish this fight?
Maggie Fitzgerald: One's enough.

Lena: How do you say "lost pants" in Greek?
Yia Yia: Greek girls do not lose their pants!

What is it about good sex that makes me have to crap? You really jarred something loose tiger.

Landlady

Marianne: I was never so grateful in all my life as I am to Mrs. Jennings. Oh, Elinor, I shall see Willoughby and you will see Edward. Are you asleep?
Elinor Dashwood: With you in the room?
Marianne: I do not believe you act as calm as you look, Elinor. Not even you. Oh, I will never sleep tonight. And what were you and Miss Steel talking about so long?
Elinor Dashwood: Nothing of significance.

Marlin: Tell me, Dory, do you see anything?
Dory: Yeah, I see a light.
Marlin: A light?
Dory: Yeah. I see a light.
Marlin: Yeah, I see it too.
Dory: Hey conscience, am I dead?
Marlin: No, no. I see it, too.

I dunno what the hell's in there, but it's weird and pissed off, whatever it is.

Clark

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