That's not Yankee dancing - that's Devil Rays dancin'!

Ben

Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker.

Mike McDermott

My boy Dale is at the Reno Correctional Facility. He's got some clarity issues. Did some home invasion, sodomy-torture type stuff; wrote a lot of bad checks.

Margie Turlock

Will: Shakespeare, Nietzsche, Frost, O'Conner...
Sean: Well that's great. They're all dead.
Will: Not to me, they're not.
Sean: You can't have a lot of dialogue with them.
Will: Not without a heater and some serious smelling salts.

Officer: What took you, Stensland?
Dick Stensland: My partner stopped to help a damsel in distress. He's got his priorities all screwed up.

You're a good husband Alan. You remind me of me.

Charlie Fineman

Bob Lee Swagger: I got a plan, but I think I'm going to need your help.
Sarah Fenn: Ok. I'll do it.
Bob Lee Swagger: I haven't even told you what it is yet.
Sarah Fenn: I know.

Sartana: I thought Machete don't text.
Machete: Machete improvises.

[a zombie is crushed by a falling piano] Poor flat bastard.

Columbus

Athena: I'm going to The Jewel. Listen, I'll get you some pantyhose.
Maria Portokalos: No queen size. They make me look fat.

Leeloo: Everything you create, you use to destroy.
Korben Dallas: Yeah, we call it human nature.

Looks like you've got a thing for butt-ugly girls, Mr. I've Got A Thing For Butt-Ugly Girls!

Austin

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