Puss in Boots: I am not looking for trouble. I am but a humble gato in search of his next meal. Perhaps you gentlemen can help me find a simple score.
Bartender: Well, perhaps if one of us were to tell the law that you were in town, we could split the reward. (Another man tries to sneak up on Puss with a sword, and fails)
Puss in Boots: You made the cat angry - you no want to make the cat angry!

I arrested a man-lady who was legally named Phuck.

Officer Slater

I ate my twin in the womb.

Lilly

[singing] I ate some bugs, I ate some grass, I used my hand, to wipe my tears.

Nacho

I bring iPod back from America and I get my neighbor iPod mini... because it is for girls!

Borat

I can shoot straight, if I don't have to shoot too far.

Scarlett

I can't believe what a bunch of nerds we are. We're looking up "money laundering" in the dictionary.

Peter Gibbons

I don't believe in God, I believe in science.

Esqueleto

Officer Mount: I don't believe it. It's that shit box Dodge again!
Trooper Daniel: Those bastards are ours now!

I don't break character until the DVD commentary.

Kirk Lazarus

Coach Norman Dale: You know, in the ten years that I coached, I never met anybody who wanted to win as badly as I did. I'd do anything I had to do to increase my advantage. Anybody who tried to block the pursuit of that advantage, I'd just push 'em out of the way. Didn't matter who they were, or what they were doing. But that was then. You have special talent, a gift. Not the school's, not the townspeople, not the team's, not Myra Fleener's, not mine. It's yours, to do with what you choose. Because that's what I believe, I can tell you this: I don't care if you play on the team or not.

I don't have to take this abuse from you, I've got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

Dr. Peter Venkman

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