I'm going to need a lawyer, a very, very good lawyer, an expensive lawyer. It could break us.

Rusty Sabich

Frank: Ara again? You gonna get an autographed picture and kiss it every night before you go to bed?
Rudy: What is your problem?
Frank: Or maybe he'll give you permission to wipe his ass.

It is YOUR LUCKY DAY... to be baptized into the Greek Orthodox Church!

Gus Portokalos

He's not my Dad, he's my stepdad!


Don't worry Bob I'll get her. And her little dog too.

Rep. Rudd

Ziad Jarrah: [Message Flashes: "Beware cockpit intrusion. Two aircraft have hit the world Trade Center] The brothers have hit both targets!
Saeed Al Ghamdi: Should I tell the others?
Ziad Jarrah: Yes. Tell them our time has come! Our time has come!

Blue Collar Man: Excuse me, I don't mean to interrupt, but what are you talking about?
Randal Graves: The ending of "Return of the Jedi".
Dante Hicks: My friend here is trying to convince me that any independent contractors working on the uncompleted Death Star were innocent victims when it was destroyed by the Rebels.

[Tristan is on the ground and Primus has his sword at his throat]
Primus: If Septimus insists on sending a boy to do a man's job...
Tristan: No! Please, I don't know Septimus. I just need a lift. Look at me, I'm unarmed. Please. Please, let me ride with you.
[Primus returns to his carriage and Tristan stands up and follows him]
Primus: I'm afraid that's impossible. I'm on a quest of enormous importance.
[Gets on the carriage]
Tristan: All the better reason to take me with you. Maybe you'll need a second pair of hands. Sir, please. Maybe Providence sent me to you as it sent you to me.
Primus: Get on.

Thirty, flirty and thriving.


Lowery: Someone has to stay behind.
Vivian: Uh, I have a boyfriend.

Kumar: How were Katie Holmes' tits?
Goldstein: You know the Holocaust?
Kumar: Yeah?
Goldstein: Picture the opposite of that!
Kumar: Nice!

Lyra Belacqua: [upon receiving the alethiometer] What is this?
Master: It's an alethiometer. It tells the truth. You are meant to have it. You keep the alethiometer to yourself, it's of the utmost importance to yourself, to all of us, and perhaps to all creation.

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