Ty Webb: You take drugs, Danny?
Danny Noonan: Every day.
Ty Webb: Good. Then what's your problem?
Danny Noonan: I don't know.

Limbo is like New Jersey. You can see all the good stuff, you just have to get there.

Phil Webster

Marla Singer: I got this dress at a thrift store for one dollar.
Narrator: It was worth every penny.
Marla Singer: It's a bridesmaid's dress. Someone loved it intensely for one day, and then tossed it. Like a Christmas tree. So special. Then, bam, it's on the side of the road.
[Grabs Narrator's crotch]
Marla Singer: Tinsel still clinging to it. Like a sex crime victim. Underwear inside out. Bound with electrical tape.
Narrator: Well, then it suits you.
Marla Singer: You can borrow it sometime.

[from the trailer] There are certain rules that one must abide by in order to create a successful sequel. Number one

Randy

Oh, you have caused me no end of trouble!

Mr. Hertz

Doc Ock: [grabs Spider-Man in the bank] You're getting on my nerves.
Spider-Man: I have a knack for that.
Doc Ock: Not anymore.

[as Simple Jack] You make my pee-pee maker t-t-tingle.

Tugg Speedman

Willie: So what are you supposed to be, a lion tamer?
Indiana Jones: I'm allowing you to tag along. So why don't you give your mouth a rest. Okay doll?
Willie: What do you mean "tag along." Ever since you got into my club, you haven't been able to take your eyes off of me.
Indiana Jones: Oh, yeah?

Truly wonderful, the mind of a child is.

Yoda

You sleep well because you're loved. I've never sleep that well.

Ramses

Jimmy: Are you married?
Wendy Savage: No... but my boyfriend is.

I look like Snuggles' accountant.

Ted

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