When I was growing up, I knew I was different. The other girls were blonde and delicate, and I was a swarthy six-year-old with sideburns.

Toula Portokalos

It's a three year contract, with a confidentiality clause. Bulletproof, retroactive. Because, with everything that you know about people at this place, it's a little unnerving when you march in here and ask for 80,000 dollars.

Barry Grissom

Is that all you people think about? Now, I admit I applied for this job because I wanted to cut loose and shake my romp, but I belive that this dilema cannot be solved by partying.

Taj

Bernie Focker: Do you want me to be macho wacho?
Greg Focker: Dad, have I ever said the words macho wacho to you?

Frank Abagnale, Jr.: [as Frank Conners] Your honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, this is irrefutable evidence that the defendant is, in fact, lying.
Judge: Mr. Conners, this is a preliminary hearing. There is no... defendant. There is no... jury. It's just me. Son... what in the HELL is wrong with you?

[Lin slaps Chon Wang]
Chon Wang: I just saved you!
Chon Lin: You were late!

Yoda: Told you, did he?
Luke: Yes.
Yoda: Unexpected, this is, and unfortunate.
Luke: Unfortunate that I know the truth?
Yoda: No! Unfortunate that you rushed to face him... that incomplete was your training. Not ready for the burden were you.

Hugo Croop: I'm very sorry.
Buddy 'Aces' Israel: Are you a collasal fuckin idiot?
Hugo Croop: I am idiot.
Buddy 'Aces' Israel: Get the phone, it's probably Mecklin. Get Fatolli up here and start cleaning all right? and please for me will you do one thing?
[Does card trick putting a card on Hugo's forehead]
Buddy 'Aces' Israel: Get out of my fucking sight.

You're a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make 14 dollars the hard way?

Al Czervik

Is it just me, or does every woman in Queens have some kind of an emotional problem?

Prince Akeem

This is beyond anything I have imagined.

Albus Dumbledore

Rusty Ryan: Hi.
Isabel Lahiri: How'd it go?
Rusty Ryan: Lousy.

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