Max: All Halloween I've been running into someone I used to know.
Penelope: [wearing a pig mask] This someone - she meant a lot to you?
Max: Yes, yes she did.
Penelope: What happened?
Max: I couldn't give her what she wanted.
Penelope: What did she want?
Max: To be free.

Capt. West: Commander Galloway, why don't you get yourself a cup of coffee.
Galloway: Thank you, sir, I'm fine
Capt. West: Commander, I'd like you to leave the room so we can talk about you behind your back
Galloway: Certainly, sir.

Will: How can you live with yourself watching people die right next to you?
Sylvia: You don't watch. You close your eyes.

Skipper: Alright, you! Where's Dave?
Skipper: Give us the good.
Kowalski: Sir, that's a baby squid.
Skipper: Sorry, laddie.

Deputy Chief Hardy: We're reviving a canceled undercover police program from the 80s. You idiots are officially transferred.
Jenko: Where do we report?
Deputy Chief Hardy: Down on Jump Street. 21 Jump Street.

Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: [talking into phone] My car is alive...
[from trailer]
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: [to Bumblebee] You're my Guardian?

The Kid: [At the swimming hole] We're only wearing suits because you're here. Usually we go naked.
Purlene DupreFloatie Dupre: So do we.
The Kid: Well, why don't we all take our suits off, then?
Purlene Dupre: Look, peckerhead, I ain't losin' the goddamned suit.

When I was seven most of my friends stopped believing in magic. That's when I first started. They were beautiful, they were happy. They didn't even need any money, they had magic cards.

Rebecca Bloomwood

Marin: Harry was once engaged to Diane Sawyer.
Zoe: Diane Sawyer? No way, I love her!
Erica Barry: That's wonderful!
Harry: Women your age love that about me.
Erica Barry: Ah.
Harry: No, that's a good thing.
Erica Barry: I'm sure you meant it as a compliment.
Harry: Yes, it was meant as a compliment.

Little Bill: What the fuck do you think you're doing?
Little Bill's wife: What the fuck does it look like I'm doing?

Ladies and gentlemen, when you look at this gorgeous couple, it's no wonder they're a household name all over the world like... bacon and eggs. Lockwood and Lamont!

Dora Bailey

I am mad at my dad. I am MAD at my dad. Why is that so hard for me to see, Tibby? I have no problem being mad at you.


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