God, I just wanna bang hot chicks!

Eli

Aunt Edna: I was afraid you'd get pulled over, Clark. You've been exeeding the speed limit for thousands of miles!
Rusty Griswold: Dad wasn't speeding. The cop stopped us because Dad forgot to...
Ellen Griswold: He was speeding, Rusty!
Rusty Griswold: No he wasn't, Mom. He...
Clark: Rusty! Listen to your mother. I was speeding. I was driving like a maniac. We can all be grateful for this man for stopping us. You see kids...
Motorcycle Cop: Here's the leash, sir. I'm going back to get the rest of the carcass off the road.

[to his friends on megaphone] Quick break, everybody. There's some nice Pakistani cold cuts there, courtesy of Mrs. Segal.

Ben

Dan: You love her like a dog loves its owner.
Larry: And the owner loves the dog for so doing.
Dan: You'll hurt her. You'll never forgive her.
Larry: Of course I'll forgive her. I have forgiven her. Without forgiveness we're savages. You're drowning.

Bo Catlett: Mr. Escobar, maybe your nephew panicked and took off.
Mr. Escobar: Why are you talking to me this bullshit? I think maybe I have Ramon and Cesar staple your tongue to your chin! What do you think?
Bo Catlett: I think you speak very good English, Mr. Escobar.

Jack: If they want to drink Merlot, we're drinking Merlot.
Miles Raymond: No, if anyone orders Merlot, I'm leaving. I am NOT drinking any fucking Merlot!

You seem angry - click your pen!

Alex Fletcher

We live, we die, and the wheels on the bus go round and round.

Edward Cole

Ty Crane: Stay outta my way bitch. I own you!
Junior Battles: Oh Hell nah!

[Dick tries to open a door in Wayne Manor, but it won't budge]
Alfred Pennyworth: May I help you, Master Grayson?
Dick Grayson: How come this is the only locked door in this museum? What do you have back here?
Alfred Pennyworth: Master Wayne's dead wives. The silver closet on your way.

Egor Korshunov: I want General Radek released from prison.
President James Marshall: How can I do that? I can't do that! DON'T ASK ME FOR SOMETHING I CAN'T GIVE YOU!

Ha-Ha! Man that's what I call a swinging party.

Baloo

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