Mr. Burgundy. You have a massive erection.

Veronica Corningstone

Riff: Four-and-a-half years I live wit' a buddy an' his family. I think I'm diggin' a guy's character... Boy, I'm a victim of disappointment in you.
Tony: End ya sufferin', little man. Why dontcha just pack up ya gear an' move out?
Riff: 'Cause ya ma's hot fa me...

Toula Portokalos: What happened? Biker fight? nose job? What?
Ian Miller: Uh... yeah.
Toula Portokalos: No, really.
Ian Miller: You don't want to know.
Toula Portokalos: Oh I don't know. If I had survived an old lady ass-kicking I would want to brag about it.

Dr. Buddy Rydell: I'm going to need you to retard your anger.
Dave Buznik: It's retarded. I'm retarded.

Beatrice Leep: Hey, cowgirl.
Roy Eberhardt: Yeah?
Beatrice Leep: I'm really glad that... You know what, I'm just gonna call you "Roy" from now on. If that's all right with you.
Roy Eberhardt: And what's wrong with Ling Ho?
[She laughs and hits him with a pillow]

Kirby: There are several quintessential moments in a man's life: losing his virginity, getting married, becoming a father, and having the right girl smile at you.

You got a library in there June.

Johnny Cash

Marcus Aurelius: When was the last time you were home?
Maximus: Two years, two hundred and sixty-four days and this morning.

Panic. It crept up my spine like first rising vibes of an acid frenzy. There I was. Alone in Las Vegas, completely twisted on drugs, no cash, no story for the magazine, and on top of everything else, a gigantic god damned hotel bill to deal with. How would Horatio Alger handle this situation?

Raoul Duke

First you yell at me, and now you're giving me the tears.

Frankie Ballenbacher

Butch Cassidy: Ah, you're wasting you're time. They can't track us over rocks.
Sundance Kid: Tell them that.
Butch Cassidy: [after looking for himself] Who are those guys?

Arley: Sit down, I want to talk to you.
Trevor McKenney: You want to lie to me.

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