Emily: One time an assistant left the desk, because she, I don't know, sliced her hand open with a letter opener. Miranda missed Lagerfeld who had boarded a seventeen hour flight to Australia. She now works at TV Guide.
Andy Sachs: Man the desk at all times. Got it.

Ms. Perky: People perceive you as somewhat...
Kat Stratford: Tempestuous?
Ms. Perky: "Heinous bitch" is the term used most often.

Doctor Marcia Fieldstone: People who truly loved once are far more likely to love again. Sam, do you think there's someone out there you could love as much as your wife?
Sam Baldwin: Well, Dr. Marcia Fieldstone, that's hard to imagine.
Doctor Marcia Fieldstone: What are you going to do?
Sam Baldwin: Well, I'm gonna get out of bed every morning... breath in and out all day long. Then, after a while I won't have to remind myself to get out of bed every morning and breath in and out... and, then after a while, I won't have to think about how I had it great and perfect for a while.
Doctor Marcia Fieldstone: Tell me what was so special about your wife?
Sam Baldwin: Well, how long is your program? Well, it was a million tiny little things that, when you added them all up, they meant we were suppose to be together... and I knew it. I knew it the very first time I touched her. It was like coming home... only to no home I'd ever known... I was just taking her hand to help her out of a car and I knew. It was like... magic.

Hamish: Personal escort of the princess.
William Wallace: Aye.
Hamish: Musta made an impression.
William Wallace: Aye.
Hamish: I didn't think you were in the tent that long.

Mary Jane Watson: Peter I'm getting married.
Spider-Man: I've always imagined you getting you married on a hill top.
Mary Jane Watson: Who's the groom?
Spider-Man: You haven't decided yet.

[preparing to whip Little Jody] And the Lord said "The fear of ye, and the dread of ye, shall be on every beast of the Earth."

Big John Brittle

Miles Logan: Put your hands on the Oodles of Noodles.
Tulley: Chicken or beef?
Miles Logan: Chicken.

Lt. Commander Mike Hewitt: Red October has just turned into the torpedo's path.
Admiral James Greer: Mother of God!

Relax, would you? We have seventy dollars and a pair of girls underpants. We're safe as kittens.

The Geek

Mr. Wong: Remember, black people run very fast. But problem run faster.
Norbit: ...That's kinda racist.
Mr. Wong: Yes, Wong very racist. Don't like black. Don't like Jew either. But black and Jew love Chinese food. Go figure.

Captain Dickson: We Jump Street, and we 'bout to jump in yo ass.
Jenko: Mmmm-hmmm.
Schmidt: Right in the crack.

Señor Bond, you got big cojones. You come here, to my place, without references, carrying a piece, throwing around a lot of money... but you should know something

Franz Sanchez

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