A cat's a better mother than you.

Rhett Butler

Some people just don't understand boundaries.

Puss in Boots

Wayne: Our enemy is wicked, so...
J.D.: Dude, she's Freddy Krueger.
Wayne: Damien.
J.D.: Dude, she's Vader.
Wayne: No! She's the Emperor.
J.D.: Yeah, but with really great tits.
Wayne: Ok, now Sandy, that girl, she's a real nice girl.
J.D.: Ah, yeah.
Wayne: She's a sweetheart.
J.D.: Dude, a saint.
Wayne: A goddess.
J.D.: A princess.
Wayne: No what? She's kinda like Mother Teresa.
J.D.: Yeah, but with way better tits.

Ennis Del Mar: What are ya doin'?
Jack Twist: Aguirre came by again. Said my uncle didn't die after all. Says bring 'em down.
Ennis Del Mar: Bring 'em down? Why? It's the middle of August.
Jack Twist: Says there's a storm moving in from the Pacific, worse than this one.
Ennis Del Mar: Well that snow barely stuck an hour. Huh? 'Sides, that son-of-a-bitch, he's cheatin' us outta a whole month's pay. That ain't right.
Jack Twist: I can spare ya a loan bud, if you're short on cash. Give it to ya when we get to Signal.
Ennis Del Mar: I don't need your money, huh, you know I ain't in the poorhouse. Shit!

[in letter to Tibby] I think we may have been very, very wrong about the pants. The one time I wore them I almost drowned...


Neville Flynn: Hey, hey, we have to figure something out.
Rick: Alright, well I know what I've got to do. We're in a two-hundred foot aluminum tube and we're thirty thousand feet in the air, and any one of those slimy little pieces of shit can trip a circuit or a relay or a hydraulic and this bird goes down faster than a Thai hooker. So my job is to keep LAX informed on how totally screwed we are and then find some way to keep this mother in the sky another two hours. Figure that out.

Guy named Otto Octavius winds up with eight limbs. What are the odds?

J. Jonah Jameson

Biff Tannen, I wouldn't marry you if you had a million dollars.

Lorraine Baines

Nora: So are you gunna ask me to dance?
Tyler Gage: I didn't know you could dance without your tights!

Well, I think Bill's got a point. If you look at the whole life of the planet, we... you know, man, has only been around for a few blinks of an eye. So if the infection wipes us all out, that is a return to normality.

Sergeant Farrell

"Now I have a machine gun. Ho ho ho."

Hans Gruber

I can take care of myself. I've been using the Bowflex.

Chip Dove

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