Mr. Chapin: You look nervous...
kid in detention: Yes sir.
Mr. Chapin: You're sweating like a pig...
kid in detention: Yes sir.
Mr. Chapin: You're eyes are all... bloodshot
kid in detention: yes sir
Mr. Chapin: You've got pot, haven't you?
kid in detention: [looks down at pocket] Yes sir.
Mr. Chapin: I'm confiscating this.
Mr. Chapin: [walks away and sees Cheetos on another students desk] ... this... too.

President Andrew Shepherd: If Mary hadn't died, would we have won three years ago?
A.J.: Would we have won?
President Andrew Shepherd: If we had to go through a character debate three years ago, would we have won?
A.J.: I don't know. But I would have liked that campaign. If my friend Andy Shepherd had shown up, I would have liked that campaign very much.

Ellie: It was a virus created by scientists in a lab. You can't honestly blame the apes?
Carver: Who the hell else am I going to blame? It was a simian flu. They already killed off half the planet.

Oh, but anyway, Toto, we're home. Home! And this is my room, and you're all here. And I'm not gonna leave here ever, ever again, because I love you all, and - oh, Auntie Em - there's no place like home!

Dorothy

I don't know if I can be with him the way he needs me to.

Anastasia Steele

Walter Fane: I knew when I married you that you were selfish and spoiled, but I loved you.
Kitty Fane: I married you even though I didn't love you, but you knew that. Aren't you as much to blamed for what has happened as I?

The blue knight rules! The red knight sucks the big one! Down, down, down. Right knight goin' down. Down, down, down. Red knight goin' down.

Chip Douglas

I don't want FOP Damn it, I'm a Dapper Dan Man!

Ulysses Everett McGill

Jason Biggs: Oh, look at the monkey.
James Van Der Beek: Now you're gonna tell me the monkey's gay.
Jason Biggs: Well, how do you know he doesn't smoke monkey pole?

You're not ashamed of me. You're really ashamed of yourself. Tell Lulu, easy on the chronic.

Korean Mother

There's so much you don't know, Jacob...

Lewis Zabel

That's the last time, Bender. That the last time you ever make me look bad in front of those kids, you hear me? I make $31,000 a year and I have a home and I'm not about to throw it all away on some punk like you. But someday when you're outta here and you've forgotten all about this place and they've forgotten all about you, and you're wrapped up in your own pathetic life, I'm gonna be there. That's right. And I'm gonna kick the living shit out of you. I'm gonna knock your dick in the dirt.

Richard Vernon

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