Priest Vito Cornelius: Because it is evil, absolutely evil.
President Lindberg: One more reason to shoot first.
Priest Vito Cornelius: Evil begets evil, Mr. President. Shooting will only make it stronger.

ELE! Everybody love everybody!

Jackie Moon

Please don't say anything important 'til I come back.


Rufus T. Firefly: How would you like a job in the mint?
Chicolini: Mint? No, no, I no like a mint. Uh, what other flavor you got?

They see only what they want to see.

Cole Sear

Percy: [When Bard approaches Laketown in his ship] Halt! Goods inspection. Papers please!... Oh, it's you, Bard!
Bard the Bowman: Morning, Percy.
Percy: Anything to declare?
Bard the Bowman: Nothing. But I am cold and tired, and ready for home.
Percy: You and me both.

Ana Pascal: [to cast-covered Harold] So what happened?
Harold Crick: I stepped in front of a bus.
Ana Pascal: What? Why?
Harold Crick: There was a boy I had to pull out of the way?
Ana Pascal: What?
Harold Crick: There was this boy, I had to...
Ana Pascal: You stepped in front of a bus to save a boy?
Harold Crick: I had to. I didn't have a choice.

Am I really dying?


My mind's not right.

Mike Winchell

Agent Frank Burton: Listen to me Nathan, were going to find you.
Nathan: Not if I find you first!

Phil Parma: Do you know that every other word you use is either 'shit', 'fuck', 'balls' or 'cocksucker'?
Earl Partridge: Could you do me a personal favor?
Phil Parma: Go fuck myself?
Earl Partridge: You got it.

...blowing away a fleeing suspect with my 44 magnum used to mean everything to me, I enjoyed it, well who wouldn't?

Lt. Frank Drebin

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