Strap, God wants you on the floor.

Coach Norman Dale

Don't water the plants, they're plastic!

Gerry Fleck

Niobe: I remember. I remember when you used to dance. I remember you were... pretty good.
Morpheus: There are some things in this world, Captain Niobe, that will never change.
Commander Lock: Niobe.
Morpheus: Some things do change.

Stephen: You said you ain't know him.
Broomhilda: Huh?
Stephen: I said, "You said you ain't know him."
Broomhilda: I don't. Stephen: Yes, you do.
Broomhilda: Mister Stephen, I don't.
Stephen: Why is you lying to me?
Broomhilda: [on the verge of tears] I ain't.
Stephen: Then why is you cryin'?
Broomhilda: You scaring me.
Stephen: Why is I'm scarin' you?
Broomhilda: Because you're scary.

I decided to stop pitying myself. Other than my eye, two things aren't paralyzed, my imagination and my memory.

Jean-Dominique Bauby

Coakley: We're going to run my favorite play. Starts with a p. And ends with an *ssy.
Fred: What is it?

He'll light the fuse on any explosive situation, and be a danger to himself and others.

Miranda Frost

Crash Davis: You don't want a ballplayer; you want a stable pony.
Skip: Nah.
Crash Davis: Well, my triple-A contract gets bought out so I can hold some flavor-of-the-month's dick in the bus leagues, is that it? Well, fuck this fucking game!
[pause]
Crash Davis: I quit, all right? I fucking quit.
[Crash exits the office and stands in the clubhouse for a minute before sticking his head back through the door]
Crash Davis: Who we play tomorrow?
Skip: Winston-Salem. Batting practice at 11:30.

Judge Smails: [to Bishop Fred Pickering] Say, Fred, did you hear the one about the Jew, the Catholic, and the Colored Boy who went to heaven?
Bishop: Yeah, Judge, that's a doozy.

Honey, I'm so proud of you. I watched you very closely, and you didn't screw up once!

Carolyn Burnham

Honey Horne: Take me, Garth!
Garth: Where? I'm low on gas and you need a jacket.

Harry Burns: That's it? Some faceless guy rips off all your clothes, and THAT'S the sex fantasy you've been having since you were 12?
Sally Albright: Well sometimes I vary it a little.
Harry Burns: Which part?
Sally Albright: What I'm wearing.

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