Simon: [talking to police on speaker] Well, is the ebony Samaritan there?
Zeus: You got a problem with ebony?
Simon: No, no. My only problem is that I went to some trouble preparing that game for McClane. You interfered with a well-laid plan.
Zeus: Well, you can stick your well-laid plan up your well-laid ass.

Sorry I'm late. Work was murder.

Norman Osborn

I'll blow a hole in your face then go inside and sleep like a baby.

Walt Kowalski

You're going a little faster than everybody else. I was wondering if you noticed that.

Sam

Jerry Lee just sit your ass down!

Johnny Cash

Mr. Peterson: [while getting lap dance] So, what was the scholarship for?
Matthew: Moral fiber.

I hate it when things don't go my way. It makes me so horny.

Kathryn

Are you ready for the truth?

Elijah Price

Charles: Any idea who the girl in the black hat is?
Fiona: The name's Carrie.
Charles: Pretty.
Fiona: American.
Charles: Interesting.
Fiona: Slut.
Charles: Really?
Fiona: Used to work at Vogue. Lives in America now. Only gets out with very glamorous people. Quite out of your league.
Charles: Well, that's a relief. Thanks.

Uh-uh, Mother-m-mother, uh, what is the phrase? She isn't quite herself today.

Norman Bates

Perseus: If I do this, I do it as a man.
Draco: But you are not JUST a man!
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Andy Sachs: So none of the girls here eat anything?
Nigel: Not since two became new four and zero became the new two.
Andy Sachs: Well, I'm a six...
Nigel: Which is the new fourteen.

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