Everything they've told you is a lie.


Chili Palmer: How did you get in here?
Ray Bones: It was easy. I told 'em I was you, I acted real stupid and they believed me.

John Milner: So, your Judy's little... Shit! How old are you?
Carol: I'm old enough. How old are you?
John Milner: I'm too old for you.
Carol: You can't be that old.

I am all that is man.


Peter Parker: Well, Harry's in love with her. She's still his girl.
Aunt May: Isn't that up to her?
Peter Parker: She doesn't really know who I am.
Aunt May: Because you won't let her. You're so mysterious all the time. Tell me, would it be so dangerous to let Mary Jane know how much you care? Everybody else KNOWS...

Pierce Patchett: I use girls that look like movie stars. Sometimes I employ a plastic surgeon. When the work had been done, that's when you saw us.
Bud White: That's why her mother couldn't I.D. her. Jesus fucking Christ.
Pierce Patchett: No, Mr. White. Pierce Morehouse Patchett.

Mares eat oats, and does eat oats, and little lambs eat ivy. A kid'll eat ivy, too... wouldn't you?

Carl Stargher

And we're gonna start a revolution ok? And You're gonna be a funny little footnote on my epic ass!

Dewey Finn

Who cares how much effort I put in, if it doesn't produce any results?


Charlie Tweeder: Hey you wanna see the new Tweeder end zone dance?
[Tweeder dances]
Charlie Tweeder: You know what it's called?
Mox: What?
Charlie Tweeder: The new Tweeder end zone dance.

Claire Standish: What's your name?
John Bender: What's yours?
Claire Standish: Claire.
John Bender: Claire?
Claire Standish: Claire. It's a family name.
John Bender: Oh, it's a fat girl's name.
Claire Standish: Oh, thank you.
John Bender: You're welcome.
Claire Standish: I'm not fat.
John Bender: Well, not at present.

Tony Mendez: You really know Warren Beatty?
Lester Siegel: Yes, I do. I took a leak next to him at a Golden Globes party once.

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