Carol: [John turns off the radio] Why did you do that?
John Milner: I don't like that surfin' shit. Rock and roll's been going down hill ever since Buddy Holly died.
Carol: Don't you think the Beach Boys are boss?
John Milner: You would, you grungy little twirp.
Carol: Grungy? You big weenie! If I had a boyfriend, he'd pound you.
John Milner: Yeah, sure.

Brint: Or the way Hansel combs his hair?
Meekus: Or like, doesn't, it's like, ex-squeeze me, but have you ever heard of styling gel?
Brint: I'm sure Hansel's heard of styling gel, he's a male model.
Meekus: Uh, earth to Brint, I was making a joke.
Brint: Uh, Earth to Meekus, duh, okay I knew that!
Meekus: Uh earth to Brint, I'm not so sure you did cuz you were all 'well I'm sure he's heard of styling gel' like you DIDN'T know it was a joke!
Brint: I knew it was a joke Meekus, I just didn't get it right away!
Meekus: Earth to Brint...
Derek Zoolander: GUYS! Can we stop with the Earth tos!

This class will be a waste of your - and what is infinitely worse - my time.

Nash

Junkie 1: Hey man, see that dude with the watch? Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Junkie 2: He could tell us what time it is?
Junkie 1: No you idiot! We could steal the watch, sell it, and get more drugs!
Junkie 2: That's a brilliant plan! I have a gun!
Junkie 3: Man, what if he has a gun too?
Junkie 1: You idiot, law-abiding citizens aren't allowed to have guns here! How do you think we'd survive if they did?
Junkie 2: Let's go fuck this guy up!

Let the showdown begin!

Megamind

I don't think Mommy likes me very much. It must be hard to love an adopted child as much as your own.

Esther

I'm a winner. I'm going to win.

Coach Boone

Can't you stop saying fuck all the time?

Elvira

Retain, even in opposition, your capacity for astonishment.

Thaddeus Stevens

Grace: I've never seen the moon that big.
Bruce: We really shouldn't waste it.

Alexander McAnally III: Dash into shore, cut across shipping lanes...
Edie Bailey: This is a hurricane coming straight at us!
Melissa Brown: Let me reduce sails, Sandy, or even go back home.
Alexander McAnally III: This is my boat. We're gonna ride this thing out, not for fun, for safety. Do what I've always done: go with the flow.

You drive. You drive. I think there's something wrong with me.

Dr. Gonzo

FREE Movie Newsletter