Well, it's Groundhog Day... again... and that must mean we're up here at Gobbler's Knob waiting for the forecast from the world's most famous groundhog weatherman, Punxsutawney Phil, who's just about to tell us how much more winter we can expect.


Kumar: Those kids put something in here.
Harold: Is it drugs? Is it semen?
Kumar: Doesn't taste like semen...

Elijah Price: Why is it, do you think, that of all the professions in the world you chose protection?
David Dunn: You are a very strange man.

Hollis Elmore: If this Israel really is the great whale of snitches, then what are we doing messing with the mob, who are correct me if I'm wrong, but I think they're gonna pour boxes of bullets into his ass?
"Pistol" Pete Deeks: [agitated] Here we go.
Hollis Elmore: What incentive is there, to track him on something small time is a fucking skip trade?

Ray: What are they doing over there? They're filming something. They're filming midgets!
Ken: Ray...
[Ray runs off and watches Jimmy being instructed by the director, who Jimmy flicks off as soon as he leaves]
Ken: Ray, come on. Let's go.
Ray: My ass let's go. They're filming midgets.

I shot Santa Claus in the face. He's real, and I shot him in the face.


Mr. Earl Brooks: [about Mr. Smith] Maybe I should drive over there and pick him up.
Marshall: No, just honk. Maybe he'll get killed crossing the street. Save us the mess of doing it.
[Both start laughing. Then, Mr. Brooks honks the horn and Mr. Smith nearly gets hit by a car while crossing]
Mr. Earl Brooks: Almost.

There were people sufferin' in pain and hunger. Some people their tongues were hangin' out of their mouths.


Adult Pi Patel: What has mamaji already told you?
Writer: He said you had a story that would make me believe in God.
Adult Pi Patel: [laughs] He would say that about a nice meal.

Jimmy: Meet your groomsmen!
Doug Harris: These guys can not be my groomsmen. It looks like the entire cast of Goonies grew up and became rapists!

Tell no-one we have spoken, for all shall reveal itself in due course.


I can see now I never really committed to Laura. I always had one foot out the door, and that prevented me from doing a lot of things, like thinking about my future and... I guess it made more sense to commit to nothing, keep my options open. And that's suicide. By tiny, tiny increments.


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