Dudley Frank: [upon seeing Maggie] She's perfect for me. I wanted to say something funny, but all I could think of was black jokes.
Bobby Davis: Do tell... which ones? Why don't you tell the one that ends with me beating your ass?

Andy Stitzer: I just don't want a big box of porn in my apartment.
David: There's some really great stuff in here. Really great movies in here, man. Hey, did you ever see School of Rock?
Andy Stitzer: Yeah.
David: Well, this is... It's called School of... You know...
Andy Stitzer: That's nice.
David: But it stars Jack Black Cock.
Andy Stitzer: That makes sense.

That's a lot of prepositions.

Javier

To infinity, and beyond!

Buzz

Baja Miller: The only time you're happy is when you're hurting people.
Ryan McCarthy: Oh?
[she turns to walk off and he grabs her arm - hard]
Baja Miller: Ryan, ow. Ryan, stop you're hurting me.
Ryan McCarthy: [stone-faced] And tell me, do I look happy?

You know, they really should tell you if they're gonna just let Komodo dragons run loose around the hotel.

Reuben Feffer

Sloane: What could happen to it? It's in a garage.
Cameron: It could get wrecked, stolen, scratched, breathed on wrong... a pigeon could shit on it! Who knows?

[to house plant] Hello. My name is Elliot Moore. I'm just going to talk in a very positive manner, giving off good vibes. We're just here to use the bathroom, and we're just going to leave. I hope that's okay.

Elliot Moore

Lee: You owe me a copy of the Beach Boy's greatest hits.
James Carter: Don't you go having gettin' an attitude with me Lee. I been here three days and ain't done nothin' but work your cases. The only reason why I'm here in Hong Kong is 'cause you said you was gonna show me a good time. I'm on vacation, man! and I want some mu shu.
Lee: Mushu, you hungry?
James Carter: No, not mushu? MU shu. I want to see some women man. Now, stop playing dumb and take me to the SHU.

Jack Tanner: I think all the chemicals from that beauty salon have gotten to your head.
Mooney: It's a *day spa*, you fuck.
[Mooney hesitates a bit, then shows Tanner Ryan's Cell Phone, front facing Tanner's face]

Jack Sparrow: [to Weatherby Swann] I think we've all arrived at a very special place. Spiritually, ecumenically, grammatically.
Jack Sparrow: I want you to know that I was rooting for you. Know that.

Detective Rhonda Boney: Does Amy got friends we can talk to?
Nick Dunne: No, not really
Detective Rhonda Boney: You don't know if she has friends, you don't know what she does all day and you don't know your wife's blood type.

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