Not only are you a cheat, you're a gutless cheat as well.

Doyle Lonnegan

Sally Albright: Well, if you must know, it was because he was very jealous, and I had these days of the week underpants.
Harry Burns: Ehhhh. I'm sorry. I need the judges ruling on this. "Days of the weeks underpants"?
Sally Albright: Yes. They had the days of the week on them, and I thought they were sort of funny. And then one day Sheldon says to me, "You never wear Sunday." It was all suspicious. Where was Sunday? Where had I left Sunday? And I told him, and he didn't believe me.
Harry Burns: What?
Sally Albright: They don't make Sunday.
Harry Burns: Why not?
Sally Albright: Because of God.

You have to do the best with what God gave you.

Mrs. Gump

Look everybody, Pana Banana's got a heinie! He's got a heinie!

Dave Buznik

Woody: [in Bonnie's room; she is playing with her toys and Woody]
[voice box]
Woody: There's a snake in my boot!
[Bonnie pulls his string again]
Woody: I'd like to join your posse, boys, but first I'm gonna sing a little song.
Bonnie: A sheriff!
[she sets Woody down at a table surrounded by stuffed animals]
Bonnie: Move over, Mr. Pricklepants!
[she pushes him aside]
Bonnie: We have a guest!
[she hops from foot to foot]
Bonnie: You want some coffee?
[she sets out cups and pretends to pour from a pitcher]
Bonnie: It's good for you, but don't drink too much or you'll have to - Be right back!
[she runs out the door]
Woody: [Woody looks around, the other toys are still frozen] Pssst! Hey! Hello! Can you tell me where I am?
Mr. Pricklepants: Shh!
[he freezes again]
Buttercup: The guy's just asking a question.
Mr. Pricklepants: Well, excuse me! I am trying to stay in character!
Buttercup: [to Woody] My name's Buttercup.
Mr. Pricklepants: [at Buttercup] Shh!
Trixie: I'm Trixie!
Mr. Pricklepants: [at Trixie] Shhh!
Trixie: [back at him] Shhh!
Woody: [waves his arms] Guys, hey! Look, I don't know where I am...
Trixie: We're either in a cafe in Paris or a coffee shop in New Jersey.
Buttercup: We do a lot of improv here. Just stay loose, have fun, and you'll be fine!

May God have mercy on Anne's soul.

King Henry VIII

You see the world through John Malkovich's eyes. Then after about 15 minutes, you're spit out into a ditch on the side of the New Jersey Turnpike!

Craig Schwartz

Oh, never mind. I'm sure you have plenty more poly-blend where that came from.

Nigel

When we first started hanging out together, this morning, we were just friends; but things change, and I've fallen in love with you. I just know that if you gave me a chance, I could make you feel so good. So I am coming, not as your buddy, and not as a co-counselor, but for the first time as a man - a man who loves a woman, and who wants to hold her and provide for her and, yes, have sex with her; but no, seriously, Katie, I love the way you laugh and I love the way your hair smells and I love it that sometimes for no reason you're late for shul, and I don't care that you're bowlegged and I don't care that you're bilingual - all I know is that I would have said no to every single person on your list because I've always wanted you.

Coop

Today we acknowledge a really terrible loss. Cedric Diggory was, as you all know, exceptionally hard working, infinitely fair-minded, and most importantly, a fierce, fierce friend. Therefore, I feel you have the right to know exactly how he died. You see, Cedric Diggory was murdered, by Lord Voldemort. The Ministry of Magic does not wish me to tell you this. But not to do so I feel would be an insult to his memory. Now the pain we all feel at this dreadful loss reminds me, and, reminds us, that though we may come from different countries and speak in different tongues, our hearts beat as one. In light of the recent events, the bonds of friendship made this year will be more important than ever. Remember that, and Cedric Diggory will not have died in vain. You REMEMBER THAT... and we'll celebrate a boy who was kind, and honest, and brave, and true, right to the very end.

Dumbledore

We don't wanna talk, we wanna scream at people, but we don't wanna listen or problem solve and that's what's frustrating about the fucking dynamic of the group

Ricky Slade

Shit happens alright? Shit fucking happens... christ!

Mickey

FREE Movie Newsletter