Was it morally wrong to exploit our knowledge of the future for personal financial gain? That hot tub time machine turned us into kings!

Lou

Gus: Phil? Like the groundhog Phil?
Phil: Yeah, like the groundhog Phil.
Gus: Look out for your shadow there, buddy.

Tony D'Annunzio: Another Rob Roy, Bishop?
Bishop: You never ask a navy man if he'll have another drink, because it's nobody's goddamned business how much he's had already.
Judge Smails: Wrong, you're drinking too much your Excellency.
Bishop: Excellency, fiddlesticks, my name's Fred and I'm a man, same as you.
Judge Smails: You're not a man, you're a bishop, for God's sakes.
Bishop: There is no God...

You guys gotta get me out of here! There's this guy Nasty Nate who wants my cocktail fruit, and everyone here likes fresh fish! Then The Squirrel Master came out of left field and told me I'm his bitch!

Kenny

Wow, that was such an expensive looking explosion! I can't believe we had that in the budget.

Fozzie Bear

Professor Henry Jones: I didn't know you could fly a plane.
Indiana Jones: Fly, yes. Land.... no.

The only good thing you ever did for the gals was get hit by that train!

Penny Wharvey McGill

Galloway: I don't think you're fit to handle the defense.
Kaffee: You don't even *know* me. Ordinarily it takes someone *hours* to discover I'm not fit to handle a defense.

Landon: Neither do you. Maybe you're just too scared that someone might actually want to be with you.
Jamie: And why would that scare me?
Landon: Because then you wouldn't be able to hide behind your books, or your frickin' telescope, or your faith. No, no, you know the real reason why you're scared? It's cause you wanna be with me too.

Ned: If you were a flavor of ice cream, what would it be?
Marcie: Rocky road.

We must kill them. We must incinerate them. Pig after pig... cow after cow... village after village... army after army...

Kurtz

Neighbor: You're not watching the soldiers, Joseph?
Joseph: We've seen Romans before.
Neighbor: Yes. And we will see them again.
[the neighbor examines some boards which have not been assembled]
Neighbor: My table is not finished. Where is your son?
Joseph: He's walking in the hills.
Neighbor: [disapproving] Mm-hm. He neglects his work, Joseph.
Joseph: No. Once I reproached him with forgetting his work. He said to me, "I must be about my Father's business."
Neighbor: Then why isn't he here, working?
Joseph: [smiling] He's working.

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