Cho Chang: [in the room of requirement] Mistletoe.
Harry Potter: Probably full of nargles.
Cho Chang: What are nargles?
Harry Potter: No idea.
[they kiss]

Tyler Durden: Motherfucker! You hit me in the ear!
Narrator: Well, Jesus, I'm sorry.
Tyler Durden: Ow, Christ... why the ear, man?
Narrator: Guess I fucked it up...
Tyler Durden: No, that was perfect!

Capt. Ramsey: Mr. COB!
Chief of the Boat: Yes, sir?
Capt. Ramsey: You're aware of the name of this ship, aren't you Mr. COB?
Chief of the Boat: Very aware, sir!
Capt. Ramsey: It bears a proud name, doesn't it, Mr. COB?
Chief of the Boat: Very proud, sir!
Capt. Ramsey: It represents fine people.
Chief of the Boat: Very fine people, sir!
Capt. Ramsey: Who live in a fine, outstanding state.
Chief of the Boat: Outstanding, sir!
Capt. Ramsey: In the greatest country in the entire world.
Chief of the Boat: In the entire world, sir!
Capt. Ramsey: And what is that name, Mr. COB?
Chief of the Boat: Alabama, sir!
Capt. Ramsey: And what do we say?
Capt. Ramsey, Chief of the Boat: Go 'Bama!
Everyone: Roll Tide!

Judge Chamberlain Haller: Mr. Gambini, didn't I tell you that the next time you appear in my court that you dress appropriately?
Vinny Gambini: You were serious about that?

Vinny Gambini: Ms. Vito, it has been argued by me, the defense, that two sets of guys met up at the Sac-O-Suds, at the same time, driving identical metallic mint green 1964 Buick Skylark convertibles. Now, can you tell us by what you see in this picture, if the defense's case holds water?
[Lisa examines the picture]
Vinny Gambini: Ms. Vito, please answer the question: does the defense's case hold water?
Mona Lisa Vito: No! The defense is wrong!
Vinny Gambini: Are you sure?
Mona Lisa Vito: I'm positive.

Dale Doback: My dad and I decided that Nancy's kind of hot, so maybe we should just both bang her and in the meantime deal with the retard.
Brennan Huff: Who's the retard?
Dale Doback: You.
Brennan Huff: Oh.

My dreams are a cruel joke. They taunt me. Even in my dreams I'm an idiot... who knows he's about to wake up to reality. If I could only avoid sleep. But I can't. I try to tell myself what to dream. I try to dream that I am flying. Something free. It never works...


My God. I haven't been fucked like that since grade school.

Marla Singer

My hair, he shot my hair. Son of a bitch!

Princess Vespa

Mini-Me: [Mini-Me unzips his pants]
Nigel Powers: My lord! you're a tripod. What you been feedin' that thing, eh? It looks like a baby's arm holding an apple. Good thing is, if you ever get tired, you can use it as a kickstand!

My miracle pill for the middle-aged man!

Inspector Jacques Clouseau

My name is Max. My world is fire. And blood.

Max Rockatansky

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